Demon of the East (DISCONTINUED)
by TheFunnyMonkey
Summary: Until further notice.
1. Chapter 1

"So you're stayin' huh?" Revy asked me.

"I'm not a hostage anymore..." I said with a shrug and smirk. "And I got no where to go... that a problem?"

"You want it to be a problem?" She said with a sneer but I could easily see the small grin she had.

I shrug while Dutch and Benny watch us talk between ourselves, amused.

"He he, I know a place that could a sailor, if you're interested." Revy reached into her pocket and brought a lighter and reached into another pocket to pull out 2 cigarettes, lighting them both while handing one to me.

"Thanks." I mutter. I then take a drag of the wonderful tobacco filled, lung cancer inducing paper stick.

"They're a Delivery company..."

"That brushes against the law from time to time. Am I right?" I smiled.

Revy chuckled but said nothing.

"Hey Rock." Benny said, turning towards me.

"_Rock? Is that seriously going to be my name now? Great..." _I thought. "Yeah, what's up?" Revy and Dutch turned towards him as well, with shit eating grins on their faces. It wasn't really hard to notice them either, not that they were trying to hide them or anything.

"_Aaahhh great... the name sticks, this is fan-fucking-tastic, but whatever I don't really mind, I guess it's only natural since I don't think any of their names are their real one's. Well i guess it doesn't really count for Revy since i know about her, but the other two...not so much." _I mused in my head. I was brought out of my thought's when Benny asked his question.

"I've been wondering... you have any idea what was on that disc?" He asked with a confusion clearly on his face.

"_If the disc had porn on it, I am seriously going to go back to japan and kill someone, but alas that's not the case since bossy-man told me, although I don't really think he was telling the whole truth..."_

"When we first met I had no idea but after the whole 'Could you stay here while we make it sound like you died?' bullshit, I found out from my Boss that it had something to do with nukes." I shrug with a deadpan face. All three of their faces formed from mild amusement and slight confusion to shock in a matter of milliseconds, if I didn't have my emotion/expression training from back then, I would have died from laughter.

"C-could you run t-that by us again?"

"Had something to do with nukes. I don't know the whole story but you don't have to worry bout the big bad ol' government coming after us Benny. It's all over now. Now... there a place to get a drink around here?"

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At the Yellow Flag 20 minutes later...

Revy opened the doors in front us and as soon as she did, a strong smell immediately made its way into my nose, now I'm not one to get sick from a smell but this one comes dang close, with the heavy smell of booze, smoke from cigars as well as from cigarettes, sex... _"Wait sex? What the actual fuck, isn't this a public place?" _Apparently sex does indeed make its way in here since I see a girl and 2 guys going at it in the back corner of the bar, but does anyone pay any attention to the small gangbang happening right next to them? Pfft no, they act like its an everyday thing like breathing or blinking, but I guess this is what this island does best... being the asshole of the earth.

"Yo Bao!" Revy yelled over to the apparent bartender of this fine *cough shit stained cough* establishment. Of course her yelling attracted attention from (almost) everyone else in this, again, fine *cough rotten to the ass crack cough* establishment. The people who did look over, looked on in fear, excitement, not really caring, and last but not in the very least, lust. _"Ha, course they look at her with googly eyes, any man worth his salt will look at those shapely legs, nice firm ass (_which incidentally won't quit, thank god...)_ and bouncy tits. Hell give her the right clothes and she would look like a girl who will give you a quote on quote 'good time' of course that goes for almost every woman on earth... except the feminists... _*shutters*_" _I was brought out of my musing's but Dutch's voice.

"Yo Rock, you ok? This place too much for ya?" He inquired.

"Huh? Oh no nothing wrong, just thinking of something. And no this place isn't too much for me...I almost want to stay too little since I don't see a shooting range." I mutter the last part to myself.

"Hmm." Was all he said.

We then got to the bar in which we all took seat's, with 3 shot glasses for each of us and a bottle to share between ourselves.

"_I don't remember ordering anything, must've been Revy while I was in my own little world, which also reminds me I gotta stop doing that, my little world is seriously gonna get me killed, already came close with too many times to count."_

"To Rock! Our newest member to Lagoon company! And also to the poor bastards who I shot yesterday... But really who could blame me, they touched my ass and i shot them in the head, its only fair." Revy half yelled. Dutch and Benny downed their while she was talking. I meanwhile sweat dropped at her 'toast'. I lifted the glass to my nose to see what kind it was but apparently Revy would have none of that. Now that i look back on it i could have just read the label but i didn't really think about it so... *shrugs*

"Come on pussy, just drink it don't smell it. You're not of those wine tasting guys are you? Cause if you are I'm just going to go ahead and throw you out the window."

"No, I'm not one of those people but I do admit I drink wine from time to time, but this... this is my shit right here." To make my point I ditch the glass and grab the bottle and down it, of course I couldn't down the whole bottle with the burning in my throat and all, but apparently that's not the only reason since Revy snatched out of my hand before I could.

"Oi, oi dipshit leave some for us, this is Bao's last bottle of Bacardi, like hell I'm letting you down it in one go while I only had a 1 fucking shot...ONE!"

_"Shit...no kiddin? Bacardi eh? Haven't had that in years, almost forgot how 'invigorating' it is."_

I could feel the heat go the my cheeks already from the alcohol making its way through my system.

"HA! Snooze you lose." I grab the bottle back attempting to take another swig but Revy just stuck her hand in between my lips and the bottle, cutting off my little piece of heaven.

"Oi, motherfucker what in the FUCK did I just tell you?!"

"That you're my bitch?" Over course I would say that while I'm drunk... cause that's what drunk guys do... that dig their own graves. But alas I'm not drunk so I guess slightly sober guys can dig their own graves too, and this just proves it.

Dutch and Benny, who were downing their third shot, promptly spit it right back out and looked at me like I was the one who brought upon the apocalypse, which in all actuality, I did. But you know, for me.

"Did you just say what i think you just said cowboy?" She said in a dangerously low tone.

Now I'm not one to piss his pants when scared but this comes mighty close.

"T-that there is a bitch outside, right now, outside those doors, you know as in the female dog." I tried to reason...obviously failing hard.

"_Ladies and gentlemen I present to you, Liar of the year! *applause*" _

"Yeah, and I'm the nicest girl you'll ever meet, but of course we both know that's not true... is it?" She said in a dangerously low voice.

I respond in kind with all the manliness I could muster and promptly grabbed the bottle from her hands and downed it in one go, of course another bad idea but hey it helps numb the pain when you know that an imminent castration is upon you.

Revy was of course mad since you could clearly see her twitching face and finger's, which were going for their respective partners in crime, the twin Beretta's promptly called Cutlasses by their owner, Rebecca Sharp A.k.A Revy A.k.A Two Hands, ya I was researching all of this at my office before I got here and my co-workers could NOT understand why I was laughing so hard.

_"__Come on seriously did she name herself? Cause if do that was a bad idea but hey if she got that name out on the street, ain't non my bidness..."_

I'm not called Demon of the East for nothing you know. I do my homework, no matter how safe the route you take or how safe the place you're going is, there is always danger in every crevice, learned that the hard way... oh and did I also mention that I was running like my life depended on it? Oh right it does, Revy had her Cutlasses out and emptied her clip's before I even made it out the door.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Dear god in every culture. I. Am. Sorry!"

'Whizz' Yeah that one clipped a few hairs on the right.

"Aaahhh!" I yell in kind, and of course it was a manly scream, I'm a man, that scream just now was from one of the hooker I just passed...

I guess you're wondering why I'm acting like such a little bitch instead of the great and wonderful (who is also insane) Demon of the East, right now aren't you? Yeah thought so. Fine, I'll tell you, of course that info comes with a price you know, yeah that price is KEEP READING DIP SHIT. *Ahem* Now onto the story.

My life started out as any regular mushy goodie two shoes story, great family, good friend's, pistol with 15 kills to it's name by the time I was 16. Oh right I skipped a few things didn't I? Yeah life started out great of course I was sane back then, well sanER but that's a different story, oh wait ha ha *straight face* it isn't.

Ok, ok I get it I'll stop busting your balls/ovaries.

*Ahem*

Like I said before life start out great, again, Great family, which consisted of my momma, pappa, big bro, and good friends, like this one girl I had as a childhood friend, I don't remember much of her, moved to Venezuela when her parents died, tried looking her up when I had my old status Demon of the East, but all I could find out from her name was some Revolution bullshit or something like that.

Daddy was the CEO for a company, while my Mommy was a stay at home Wifey, Big Bro was an all star quarter back for our hometowns football team. (Yes they have American football in Japan) Now onto lil' ol' me, *Blinks cutely as a man could with puppy dog eye's* I was the brains of the family, which I got from my Pop, my Bro got Ma's stamina *Yes that also applies to perverted purposes happy?*

Of course brains, in kind, come with slightly weird thought's I mean seriously how in THE hell could I NOT think about killing that dog across the street I mean seriously the thing barks *cough barked cough* at everything it see's, I myself am quite surprised that the damn things throat didn't give out earlier in life but hey at least that dog bark, bark no mo.

After that I started getting homicidal tendencies like you know, the run of them mill stuff, wanting to kill your classmates, teacher, principal, and of course the idiot's that run supreme on the internet, you know the duck faced, selfie obsessed asshole's who thought that 2013/2014 was America's birthday... I'M FUCKING JAPANESE AND I KNOW MORE AMERICAN HISTORY THAN SOME OF THE FUCKNUTS THAT ACTUALLY LIVE THERE! *Ahem* Sorry for that outburst *Run's hands through hair* I just... I just... I... you know what never mind *runs hand through hair again* lets continue.

As i said before i had homicidal tendencies so of course i go out of my way to bring a kitchen knife to school and tried to kill one of my classmates who pissed me off a little too much but since i was new to the whole killing thing i messed up and only cut his arm, leg, and a little bit of his face. Little fucker got away and lived to see another day but me... i was put into therapy since i was too young to be put in jail oh and i should also mention that i bullshited my way through the trial saying he attacked me and wouldn't stop so i acted in self-defence, of course it was bullshit but that's besides the point. We won with me going into therapy and the family that lost didn't get a dime for the hospital bills. Yeah having a kick ass CEO with tons of lawyers for a Dad is pretty great.

Therapy sessions went great as far as i could tell, well as good as a 11 year could tell anyway. The file with my name on it saying i had 'Homicidal Tendencies' didn't really help but whatever. My life from then on went down the drain, family sorta kinda feared me after reading my file. Big Bro stayed away from me like the plague except for family dinner's since he couldn't really get out of it. Momma mia got a bad case of the jumps whenever i accidently sneak up behind her, did i enjoy scaring the shit outta my mother by accident? You can bet your ass crack that i did. Poppa peepa was just cold to me, not really caring but hey that comes with the territory of having a psycho for a kid.

My highschool years pretty much ended up the same but i finished early since you know i have the brains of the family... graduated by the time i was 14. Highschool didn't treat me well, like any other cliché high school story, people bullied me for being smarted than them, like no for real one group picked on me for being smart... man life must pretty much suck if they make fun of a person ages smarter than them. Oh and one group didn't really have anything against me per say but they did like giving me whirlies and sucker punches to the stomach did it hurt like a bitch? Yes it did. Did they repeatedly do it? Yup. Did they make you lose air and throw up at once almost without a chance to breath and lost consciousness since you were puking so hard and couldn't draw breath? Hell yeah i did. What? You think this is a goodie goodie story?

Nevermind... you're asking the wrong question. Did you get revenge? Pfft, no i didn't really feel like going back to therapy and possibly getting thrown in either a jail cell or a mental institute. Oh wait sorry thats some other shithead that was talking... YOU BET YOUR ASS I DID. Its funny since no one really thought to look in a cemetery for some of the kids that went 'MISSING' but with the blood stains on some of the kids' room's carpet, a duffel bag full of blood packets from the football player i killed that was stuffed inside his locker, one of the kids had a private bathroom which i took advantage of and cut all the limbs off this one bitch that decided i should become her little pet servant (Yeah one of THOSE girls) and promptly emptied the tub that was full of blood so her parent's could see her 'Beauty' better (what i mean by that is that i had to take 2 hours of my day off just to clean the tub and get the body part's in place, which also means i just stuffed them in the tub...no time whatsoever was wasted on the kids i killed, except for the cleaning of the bath tub...bitch actually made me clean her bath tub AFTER she died...) oh and a body stuffed into a trunk of a car, the idea they went missing quickly vanished. No one knew it was me. Of course people suspected it was me, especially my family, but i was never convicted.

While i was talking about my greatness, Revy stopped chasing me and now that we were finished with our drinking, we promptly head to our apartments. I also found out i have to share a room with Revy, who had a fit over it and nearly put a bullet in my groin saying if i did anything to her with her sleeping, she would shoot off the thing i hold most dear to my heart... *shutter's*

It was the end of the day and Dutch said to go to bed early tonight since they apparently had another job to go on tomorrow before they met lil' ol' me, i think it was taking something from a freighter, or taking the freighter it self... i don't know but also they apparently need my skill set in negotiations since they saw a sliver of my awesomeness when i was bullsh- *ahem* talking my way through the whole ordeal of me gettin kidnapped... oh and i planned on that happening but like i said i need to go to bed since i have a job tomorrow so i bid you a good fuck off and shall tell the rest of my tale next time cause cliffhangers rule the world and all that.

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**So? How'd you like it? I thought it went great :D i hope to write more chapters of this soon, well that is if you guy's want me to keep writing it which i hope you do... so yeah review and tell me what you thought about it, tell me if i made some kind of mistake with grammar or spelling and i'll fix it right away :D**

**TheFunnyMonkey... OUT **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guy's what's up? TheFunnyMonkey here again with another chapter of Demon of the East and I must say I'm having fun writing this story, of course I really sorta kinda can't continue if I don't know what people think of it so if you could so kindly put a review that would make me so happy :D **

**Oh and another thing I may or may not do sex scenes I may IMPLY them but not actually do them... fight scenes will be made although they may or may not be good since this is like my 3rd story in my history of writing and I admit I ditched both of them with one being only 2 chapters long and horribly written and the 2nd one I had on that I didn't feel the vibe for but I will try my hardest to actually finish this story even though I don't know how long it will be but I am having fun so far and I had great ideas for future chapter's so make sure to follow and/or favorite this story for irregular updates :D**

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I had a pretty good sleep last night, like really great, never felt better. Of course panties laying on top of me from head to toe is a HUGE bonus, I mean seriously what motherfucker in their right mind, would NOT like waking up to being covered in panties I mean seriously you don't hear me complaining one bit. Oh wait. Yeah. You do.

I should start this little tale by saying I had a good drink last night with my new crew. We got blasted drunk, after the whole 'That you're my bitch?' thing. I should thank Revy for the bullet to the brave hair's that lost their lives, really needed a trim. But anyway, after all that happened we had a good drink and got drunk off our asses and went back to our rooms in the apartment's. Since there were no more rooms available, with some actually being taken and some being destroyed beyond repair, I had to bunk with Pistol girl who is commonly known as Revy, since apparently Dutch and Benny didn't have room... supposedly.

Anyway we got to our rooms and I passed out on the guest room bed after I clumsily changed into a black muscle shirt and grey sweat pants, which by the way in the morning the shirt I put on was backwards and apparently my legs wanted to be snuggled up together that night since both legs were in one pant leg. Revy of course just striped off her gear and went to bed with only her black shirt and panties on, which she looked absolutely sexy in by the way.

I had a good morning despite the massive hangover I was experiencing, awesomely comfortable position, panties covering me head to toe, some not worn and some used, which smell wonderful by the way, even the ones with wets spot's. Dear GODS they smelled delicious. Oh and did I ever mention how much I HATE Dutch and Benny? Yeah I hope my good ol' buddy the Grim Reaper comes and takes their souls away prematurely.

You see... in their drunken stupor, they thought it would be absolutely HI-FUCKING-LARIOUS to put ALL of Revy's panties on me while sleeping... even the one she was wearing when she went to bed... which was RIGHT under my nose and lemme tell yeah brother... no smell that I have ever smelled in my life EVER smelled greater than that used panty... dear gods is all I have to say.

Currently I am on a chair in front of Revy who is sitting on the sofa with a coffee table in between us. Wish me luck fellow men... my fate is about t be decided.

"Rock..." She said in an even tone, which just made it worse.

"Y-yes The mighty and wonderful Queen Revy?" I manage to sputter out. Yes, yes, I know, why is the former 'Demon of the East' getting scared right now? Well fuck me man, if you don't know why I'm scared for my life right now, then you are the biggest fucking idiot that ever walked on this earth.

If she liked the title I gave her or not... she didn't show it.

"Before I bust a cap in your Japanese ass, I want to ask why you thought it would be awesome to sleep... COMFORTABLY, under my panties, including the one's I was WEARING LAST NIGHT!" She yelled and put her foot on the coffee table.

"Don't look at me! Last thing I remember was getting shit faced and coming back here to change and then i went to bed, which I might also add that I slept like a baby thank you very much." Rock... you fucking idiot.

"Oh so you like sleeping under a woman's underwear huh? Including the one i wore to bed. Mighty bold of you to say that Rocky Boy." She sat back down and smiled creepily... did I ever mention that I was an idiot? Cause if I didn't, I'll tell you right now that I am an idiot.

"I mean well it doesn't really hurt once you smelled the aroma of used panties right after you wake up after the best sleep you ever gotten. Yeah it doesn't hurt one bit. If fact, it felt *ahem* sorry I mean smelt pretty good waking up to that." I nod at my logic and smile, I then pick up the my coffee that was on the table and took a sip, only to realize what I just said.

"_Fuck me and all that is holy. Mom, Dad, Big bro I love you. Can't wait to see you where ever you are." _I think out one last time before Revy got out her Cutlasses and shot my coffee mug out my hand, shot the chair a few times so it broke and I fell flat on my, as Revy calls it 'Japanese' ass. She then proceeds to empty both her clips on me, well not ON me but very damn close. The bitch shot my outline so there was a duplicate of my body after she's done firing.

"F-fuck me Revy, nice shot." I say rather surprisingly, calmly.

She raises a brow as if questioning why the hell I didn't freak out after that but said nothing about it.

"Look, Revy I seriously don't know how your panties got on me, I really don't. Someone must have thought it would be hilarious to put your panties on top of me while I was sleeping. I'm not the kind of guy who does that if you hadn't noticed." I get back up and brushed myself off, only to again, realize something. When Revy shot my coffee mug, the steaming, right out of the pot, coffee splashed right onto my body, more specifically, my crotch.

"Ouch dude, you should probably put and ice pack on that bitch." She managed to say before a, I really do mean it, manly scream echoed throughout Roanapur.

"God...FUCKING...DAMNIT. BEING SHOT DOESN'T EVEN COMEPARE TO THIS SHIT" I scream as I make my way to the freezer and pulled out frozen blueberry's and smashed the little fucker into my pants and on my crotch.

Revy, the entire time, was literally rolling on the floor... laughing... at my pain... bitch.

"God damn does that feel good." I let out a content sigh and walk over to the sofa and step over Revy and proceeded sit down, ignoring Revy's laughing amazingly.

"Hehehehe that was so hehehe fucking heheheAHAHAHA funny." Revy managed to get out.

"Ahahahaha..." I laugh humorlessly. "...I am so happy that my pain is the cause of your laughter." I say in a monotone voice.

"Ehehehe..." She let out a content sigh. "...that was hilarious, if that happen's every night I might just tolerate you sleeping over here."

Oh and did I forget to mention I'm an idiot?

"So that means you'll not only let me sleep here but also let me take all of your panties and put them on me while I go to sleep? Even the ones I pull off you to make an absolute complete hill of panties on top of me?"

She gives me a deadpan expression before slowly reaching for one of her guns.

"I-i-it was a j-joke I swear!" I put my hand in front of me to protect me. Pfft like hands will stop a bullet...

"Hehehe calm down panty mountain douche-bag I ain't gonna kill ya..." I let out a sigh of relief. "...well at least not yet anyway."

I gulp.

Just then the door to our *ahem* her apartment was suddenly kicked down by a shotgun wielding black man, who I might add, is our leader of the group.

"Revy, Rock! Everything ok? Heard gunshots." He scans the room to see panties littering the floor a shot up chair, bits and pieces of the mug I was holding as well as the coffee that was spilt on the floor, and last but not least... my gunshot silhouette. Seeing nothing of danger he was about to address us when Benny called out.

"I-i-is it safe to come in?" Benny asked.

"Yeah come in Benny-boy, all clear."

He comes in and takes in the scene like Dutch did.

He whistles. "Damn bro what the hell happened?"

"Rock the horn dog here stole all my panties, including the ones he slipped off me, to make his little panty mountain on top of him while he slept." She says nonchalantly while checking her nails.

Dutch and Benny looked horrified yet amazed.

"How the hell are you still alive?!" Benny asked.

Dutch just whistled. "Didn't know you had it in yeah Rock, I am thoroughly impressed you managed to stay alive." He coolly said while hoisting his shotgun over his shoulder.

"I didn't do fucking anything ok? I woke up to wonderfully smelling panties on top of me. I didn't do that, i'm not a pervert. Hold on I take that back, I AM a pervert but I act discreetly and professionally and I hold high regards to women, but stealing their panties and making a mountain for me to sleep under is really not on my list of perverted things I ever wanted to do... well not anymore at least." Clever... very clever.

"Uh, Rock?"

"Yeah Benny?"

"You're not helping your case what so ever bro." He said with a deadpan expression.

"Hey can't help but say the truth." I say with a shrug.

"True that brother." He nod's along with me and my logic and we high five each other.

"Hey Rock." Dutch said.

"What happened to your dick?" He points at the wet spot on the crotch of my sweat pants which is STILL steaming but isn't hurting since its not touch what makes me a man.

"Revy shot the mug of coffee I had in my hand and well... lets just say I may or may not be able to sit for awhile, if I can then its a miracle." After I said that Dutch and Benny unconsciously move their hand closer to what also makes them men.

"Oh right, we have a job so I'm going to go and get ready you guys should too. I'll see you guys at the dock." He said before walking back to his apartment. Benny did the same thing and left to go put on some pants.

"Alright imma go change, you should too."

"Sure, sure." She said in a bored tone and made her way and closed her door, and proceeded to get ready.

As I went to my temporary, or maybe not so temporary, room and was getting ready for the day I thought to myself.

"_Great now when we get back I'M the one who's gonna have to clean up the mess in the other room, bitch will probably MAKE me do it if I don't do it. And what the actual FUCK. I just joined Lagoon Company and everyone is already buddy buddy, heh can't wait to see the look on their faces when I show them what I can do... that day may never come but whatever still a possibility. Revy has a nice ass... a REALLY nice ass _*grins perversely while thinking of certain things* _ok now where the fuck are my- oh here they are, pesky little socks, trying to hide from me under those panties, nice try but that already happened to me, like hell i'll let you stay hidden and enjoy these wonderfully smelling panties... oh right need to get my shirt." _

I was tying...well my black tie, which complimented my awesome blood red shirt thank you, when I noticed pictures on my night stand that shouldn't have been there. I walked over to them and picked one up, it had Dutch and Benny taking a selfie with drunk ass faces, laughing their asses off and I see in the background... me... with panties in the same position when I woke up... I pick up another one with Benny taking a handful of panties and throwing them on me. I pick up another one with Dutch in Revy's room taking off her panties of course they were respectable gentlemen and didn't take a picture of her little love valley of flesh, which i'm extremely mad about since all I have to go on is the full on stare it gave me when I woke up, apparently Revy didn't mind me looking and didn't do anything to cover it up... well I guess its not so bad but I would have loved a picture nonetheless. She shaves by the way, in case you were wondering... so beautiful. I was interrupted of my musing's *unfortunately* from a knock on my door.

"Yo panty mountain douche bag. Ready to go?"

My eyebrow twitched ever so slightly.

"Yeah... I'm ready..." Time for some payback bitch. "... By the way, is Two hands a title you gave yourself or did you get so popular on the streets people just started calling you that?"

All I heard was snickering, which confused me since I thought she would have broken down the door and proceed to break my nose... but no she snickers.

"Nice one Rock, but you should have thought about that better."

"How do you mean?" I continued tying my tie and made my way to the door, opened it and she replied.

"You're insinuating that everyone here has big enough dicks that I need to use both my hands, all you're doing is giving every guy on this island a compliment." She then laughs.

"Oh so you're not denying the fact you jerk people off for money?" Don't fuck with me bitch...

Her laughing stops.

"Hey we're not getting that much jobs nowadays, how is a girl like me supposed to support herself on this island?" She puts and blinks cutely which I find oddly disturbing since its so...no like her at all, already 2-3 days since joining this little group and I'm already sensing disturbances in the force.

I, surprising myself, ignore her and pointed out something.

"Hey Revy go look on my night stand." open the door fully as to allow her inside.

"Why?"

"There's something there I want you to see."

"Umm... ok." She makes her way over there with that ass that won't quit. I am very happy the choice of clothes she always see to have worn. Her black top, holsters for her Cutlasses, very and I mean very high cut jean's, I mean you can sometimes see it makes it way up her crack... *insta boner* _"Dammit..." _I think to myself with a mental deadpan face.

"What... the FUCK!"

"_There it is." _I added when it went quite for awhile.

"Fuck me, they..." Revy suddenly threw the nearest thing near the door, which was the lamp that sat there on the nightstand, loved that lamp, I shall miss you old friend.. "...fucking BASTARDS! Fucking takin off the panties that I WAS WEARING WHILE I WAS SLEEPING! Fuckers gonna pay for that." She began pacing back and forth. God she looks cute when angry. And might I add I love the way her hips move and they tiny little bounce her tits make with every step? Yeah its good to be in this company.

"So..." I look left and right in rapid succession. "...We good? I'm not the one who stole your panties and shit so... we cool Revy?"

She stopped pacing and looked at me with a deadpan face.

"Yeah we cool but if you ever do something like that, I will personally castrate you." She seethed.

"Ehehe I wasn't planning on it." I said with a smile. _"God dammit there goes that plan..."_ I added in thought.

"Alright Rock lets go, I have some bastards to kill." She pushes her way past me and into the hall outside out apartment.

"Uh Revy!" I call out.

"What!?" She poked her head out the doorway, clearly frustrated at being delayed a killing.

"You're shoes." I point to the pair she always wore, which incidentally she forgot to put on.

"Thanks." She grumbles while coming back into the apartment and slipping them on.

I myself retucked my shirt since one side was getting a little uncomfortable. I then make my way towards her to slip on my well... slipon black shoes, the ones I always wore to the boring meeting's I didn't even need to attend, god why did I have to have THAT job after I got out of the game? I will never know.

"Alright lets go, come on I'm itching to kill here." Revy whined out in the hall.

"Yeah yeah i'm coming."

I guess I'll continue where I left off and tell you the rest of my little tale.

Well lets see... where DID I leave off? *looks threw the 1 chapter again* Ah there we are *ahem*.

Now that I'm done with High School, lets go to College.

After I graduated at top of my class and the school in general, I had many offer's from different College's and amazingly University's but alas I could only chose one so I went with the best one I saw, University of Tokyo, my family was happy for me and wished me luck. Over the years since the killing spree I went on, which no one knows about thank god, my family went back to normal or maybe even greater than before and I loved it, yeah, yeah laugh it up, I wasn't exactly goodie goodie but I still loved my family... ass holes.

Anyway University was great like I mean really great, people for once didn't look down on me or made fun of me cause of my smarts, in fact they praised me for it, *perverse giggle* some of the girls there said I was cute too and some actually gave me their used panties... like What. The. Fuck. Girls that are 5-6+ years older than me are giving a 15 year old their used panties... how awesome is that yeah?

Anyway during those years I actually made friend's like real real friends, like only 3 but still how awesome is that? I guess the universe isn't as nice as I thought it was when I got called to a party over at a friends house. I had a friend of mine pick me up at the place I was staying at since he was already going to the party. We partied hard like really hard, some of the rooms in the house were filled to the roof in alcohol, of course that's not really true but that's how it would have looked if it wasn't spread out.

Anyway, we partied like it was the end of the world, at the end of the party nearly everyone was knocked out except me and my friends, we weren't as drunk as some of the other partiers but we were close. My friends were cool with me drinking up since they said I needed to let loose and get out of my books, and I must say, nice way to let loose indeedy. After everything was starting to settle down me and my friends thought, in our drunken stupor, to go and egg some people's houses, of course everything was going great till the 14th house we were at, that when things got hairy.

We were drunk, happy, stupid, and most of all having fun, I myself thought I was the one who was having the most fun. But once we got out that car and started to egg the house, the guy came out with a gun and started to fire at us, he got Daichi, first friend I ever made he was the nicest guy you would ever meet, smart too, ladies loved him but its funny how a shotgun to the stomach can change all that to just another guy the world needs to bury.

After he got deadened my 3 other friends broke out into a run to the car with me acting as driver apparently, my 3rd friend Kei, book worm like me but much more outgoing than the rest of us, nerd to the highest degree and the 3rd person I made friends with, shotgun pellet to the back of the skull ended his life.

My 2nd friend and I got away before the crazy guy could kill us for egging his house, Takao was a good friend, met him in one of my classes and we hit it off, the guy liked sports and wanted to go to a Sports College since he loved sports bordering on obsession but his family thought it would be best for him to attend here rather than the College he wanted to go to.

I was 16 at the time and had my license and was happy I could finally drive around but I was still getting used to it, being drunk didn't help and got in a car crash in our hasty get away, a piece of metal from the car we crashed into made its way into Takao's heart and ended his life right there. I blacked out and woke up in a hospital, I had minor cuts and bruises and would be allowed to discharge once I woke up.

After I got out, the police came by and took me down to the station and interrogated me on what happened and why. I told them the story the best I could but being drunk does shit for your memories, after all was said and done they told me the guy that shot at us was also drunk and was bordering OD on drugs so it wasn't really surprising he shot at us. The people I crashed into were fine as far as I found out. The parents of my friends blamed me for killing their children but I didn't know why it was entirely my fault but I guess suddenly losing your child to a drunk and drugged up gunmen and a car crash could cloud their judgments.

I was depressed after that and got into the bad kind of crowd and started doing things I shouldn't have done like drugging up and drinking til I passed out, mugging people for cash to buy booze and drugs sometimes killing them, course I was a smart guy so I wasn't about to kill someone with out thought, even a drug depraved 17 year old like me would think out how to kill a person and not get caught.

After I graduated, surprisingly I actually stayed in university I know I'm surprised too, I immediately went for a military application and they wholeheartedly accepted me a few weeks after I turned it in. I not gonna lie, throughout the years my blood lust was reaching new heights and I'm amazed I went that long without killing someone but the mugging and killing seemed to sate it for awhile but it was still there so I chose the reasonable choice to join the military and actually kill without fear of being arrested for it.

Once the military found out it was me they got the application from they put me into a specialty program which I will need to tell you about later, we reached the docks and Revy is shooting up the place and we have a job to do so i'll tell you more next time.

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**Hello once again people of I am happy you are taking time out of your day to read my insignificant story (bows) and for that I reward you a cookie (holds cookie out for you to eat) ….well come on now...i'm waiting...eat it...come on eat its your reward...EAT IT DAMMIT OR ELSE I WILL!...you really don't like cookie do you? Oh well more for me (goes chibi and starts nibbling on the cookie) Have a nice morning/afternoon/evening :D and remember to review and follow and or favorite, it really help a novice writer like me out :D **


	3. Chapter 3

"Yeah well fuck you ash hole!" Revy's loud voice and slurred words were heard even outside of the bar.

"Just go home bitch you're disturbing what little piece this hell hole has!" Said some random guy that started yelling at Revy 5 minutes ago.

"Call me *hic* bitsh again man ass *burp* eater. Shome on, I dare ya!" Recy was holding a bottle of barcardi in one hand (left) and waving a gun in her other one (right, in case your forgot your left's and rights :P)

The guy just rolled his eyes. "Seriously get out before we make you." He seethed.

Ok, let me pause this right here for a second and let me explain some shit that will probably not matter in a few minutes. After out job, which was a success by the way, the grenade that Revy threw at them helped a ton. Anyway after a job well done, if I do say so myself, we headed to the Yellow Flag for a drink cause every job we do successfully deserves getting drunk off our asses right after, although i'm starting to deter from alcohol little by little since I don't really think the massive hangovers are really worth it anymore but SOMEONE * cough Revy cough*just HAS to call me a pussy and start getting me to drink again... bitch... I swear she is making me suffer on purpose I mean seriously, here I'll give you one example of how she doesn't want me here, which is weird considering she sorta technically invited me without Dutch's consent, well that's what I think anyway, but he's been pretty chill about me being here so I say what the hell, fuck it, anyway before... hold on *scrolls through chapter 2* ah here we go, *ahem* before we got to the dock Revy thought it would be nice to give me a 'Welcome to the Crew' sort of gift, I thought it was gonna be something cool like a gun or epic shades... but no... she has to buy me a fucking Hawaiian shirt, which looks absolutely fucking disgusting. Love the gesture but... no.

Ok, so anyway back to the original topic, I've been with Lagoon Company for awhile and we just now finished a job so as usual we go to the Yellow Flag to have a drink, we get drunk off our asses, again. This time me and Revy have a super drinking contest like the other times although we (When I mean 'We' I actually mean I) have built up a little bit more tolerance so we have been going longer in our little game but now Revy was in one of her 'moods', well either that or its that time of the month. She start's getting angry about nothing at all and starts firing every which way and I have to say, for such a good shot, she didn't hit one person in her little shooting spree, some guy with his buddies get pissed and start calling Revy out on her bullshit which in turn made her more angry which, if they were actual resident here, would have known NOT to do that. Apparently the guy with his friends heard of this little piece of *cough shit stained and god forsaken cough* heaven and wanted to get a piece of the pie, of course he is a total tool and doesn't know next to shit on what to do or what goes on in this town an-

Fucking hell... this guy is gonna die, if Revy doesn't kill this guy in the next 2 minutes i'm going to go on a rampage and make this little shit pay for what he has done. During my explanation things got a little more heated between the two and they started to actually resort to hand to hand combat, she lands a hit in his groin, dirty play I know but it works, he gets angry and throws a bottle that was at another table at her but with her drunkenness, she sways to the left leaving me wide open, with my usual self I did not give a fuck what was happening behind me but I should have been watching them or else the little shit stain that had his groin shattered, ruin my favorite shirt... granted its only my 2nd shirt but still...

The bottles shatters into my back leaving a few tears in the shirt and cuts on my body... alcohol going straight for my minor wounds doesn't really help I noticed.

I, in my 'Your a fucking dead man/woman' face, turn around creepily, well as creepily as a tipsy guy can get but the bottle that dug into me with alcohol wanting to be a fucking annoyance and started to run into my flesh certainly did the trick.

"Yo Rock you alright?" Dutch asked, concerned.

"I'm fine..." I say to him, I then turn to Revy and the, about to be, dead man. "...Who threw the bottle." I ask in a calm voice.

"Hesh did Rock." Revy shakily points to the guy hunched over a little with a hand covering what used to make him a man and the other in 'I just threw that' pose.

"Oh so you're the one who thought it was a great idea to throw a bottle onto another guy's favorite shirt... am I right?" I grin a little bit.

"Y-yeah, but I wasn't aiming at you, sorry bout that, I was actually aiming at this high cut short's bitch over here." He seethes somewhat, hard to tell if he is with a higher than normal voice going on.

"Like I said before, you ruined my favorite shirt... I love this shirt... now i'm gonna have to pay overpriced repair on this thing... you're gonna fucking pay for it, on you're way out leave everything that is actually valuable on the table and then leave before I forcibly take Revy's gun and shoot you repeatedly til the clip empties only to reload and do it over again... are we clear on this, about to be dead man." I say while slowly walking over to Revy who put an arm over my shoulder, my hand is already on her left Cutlass... come on ass hole say no... say no so I can kill you... fucking do it.

"A-alright man, just calm down... I'll leave everything here..." He starts pulling off his watch and whispers over to his buddies to do what hes doing, they slightly refuse before looking at me with the Cutlass aimed at them and a finger itching to pull the trigger. They nod slightly before pulling off their valuables as well as leaving all the money from their wallets, one actually pulled out the coolest looking bowie knife I've ever see out of his boot, looking over at me before he puts it on the table with a smirk.

The ass hole crew finally leaves and I put back the Cutlass back into Revy's holster and buttoned it, with a downcast look. Fuckers didn't want to fight... maybe I put a little bit too much scary face in that situation? I actually wanted to fire a gun again but alas I couldn't since I'm as good as my word as they say. I have half a mind to pull that Cutlass back out and grab the bowie knife and fucking rush them while they still think they're safe... but I can't since I don't really want to be targeted by people since I think those guys have friend even though they are the biggest ass holes I've seen...bet ya 50 thou that they get fisted by a giant on a regular basis since they are such big ass holes.

Wait a minute... I know that knife, must be the alcohol running through me at the moment, otherwise I would have recognized the knife a lot sooner. How the hell did they get a hold of my knife? I lost that thing years ago... just who WERE those guy's? And if you're confused as to why I knew so much about them and said they were new to this town and shit... yeah they weren't people I recognized but I don't know the whole town/city whatever you wanna call it, its just what I thought they were but now... who the fuck were they?

I leave Revy sitting at the table those guys were at with Dutch and Benny slowly started walking towards the table as well, and job to the entrance looking both ways but not seeing anyone of them.

I curse under my breath and turn around to see Dutch eying the knife, like hell hes gonna have my baby... sorry Dutch you're a good pal but like hell will I ever allow you to touch or use it in anyway unless we're in a situation where it can't be helped. I then run over to the table.

Before Dutch could pick it up I suddenly grab it and pretend to look astonished... well no need to pretend since I really was astonished since its the exact same knife I lost, i'll tell you how I lost it later... that time in my life wasn't one of my proudest.

"Awesome knife! This thing looks sweet, wonder where the guy got it, maybe he had it costumed made!" I look over the knife to see it lost all its little notches and scratches from over the years but my signature under the hilt is mine, no doubt about it, those ass holes actually repaired it and left my signature *sniffle* you guys were ass holes but your were awesome ass holes.

"Oh I am so keeping this. Like hell will I sell this baby." I then realize the guy pulled it from the side of his boot and didn't leave the sheath... ok now they are back on my bad side, how the hell am I going to carry this thing? Not like I can carry it around town in one hand unless I want and early death since literally EVERYONE is packing... hell I saw a 10 year old kid rockin a desert eagle, hell if I know if he had ammo for it or had any training to use it but I wasn't keen to find out.

"Nice one Rock, did me a solid favor by stopping the fight before Revy could destroy my bar anymore than she already has." Bao said.

"It wasn't a problem, I was mostly bluffing hehehe if they started to fight back at me I would have probably let Revy handle so... no need to thank me." I rub a hand on the back of my hand, lying through my teeth.

"Bluffing or not, that was some good work, take 2 bottles of whatever you want before you leave, my reward to you." Bao smiles a nods.

"Thank you." I say while smiling back.

He nods and goes back to tending the bar.

I then feel my left shoulder put on some weight like it just had a dozen big macs for breakfast, lunch and dinner, oh wait my bad its just Dutch's hand... god that's guys hand is huge, I wonder if he ever crushed a guys skull in with it... probably best not to ask.

"Nice job Rock, didn't know you had it in ya. You ok? Looks like it hurt." I look at him and smile sheepishly.

"Thanks Dutch. And nah, i'm good, just a little cut, that's all."

He, like Bao, nods and goes back to looking at the table before taking some of the money and putting it in his back pocket.

"Damn Rock... how is the floor holding up your balls of steel? I don't think I could have done that without shaking in my shoes." Benny says.

"Ehehe it was nothing really."

"_Dude seriously? They were like... the most non-threatening people i've met here... but I bet it was an act since they had my knife... looks like a friendly gesture from someone I don't know, maybe they want me to owe them a favor? Or maybe someone is saying they know i'm still alive and kicking and know where I am? Shit I thought I covered my tracks... ugh this is hurting my brain, gonna have to think more about it tomorrow." _

"Nice job panty mountain douche bag." I feel a feminine hand on my right shoulder, my eyebrows are twitching so much right now you don't even know.

"I thought I said not to call me that ever again Revy... in fact I remember NOT piling your undergarments on myself, and again in fact I remember it was Dutch and Benny who did it, not ME!"

"Hey man don't bring us into this." Benny said holding up his hands.

"Yeah, don't blame us for your lady troubles Rock, very cowardly." Dutch coolly said.

"Oh fuck you guys, you're the ones who started this shit in the first place." I seethed. I turn my attention back to my blade.

"_God is it beautiful, was starting to forget what you looked like little one." _I smile. _"Hehe, 'member our first kill? Haha guy had eyes as big as saucers, you'd swear he was a real life version of an anime character, god they were huge." _

"Alright, I think its best we go back to our place, starting to get late and we don't want to miss a call that might be a job." Dutch said, interrupting my musings.

I yawn. "Yeah, I think that's a good idea, bout to pass out right here."

I suddenly find my self on the floor, back in serious pain since it was JUST cut and had alcohol digging into it, now I have dirt and other sorts of nasty shit getting into it. I think its gonna be infected if I leave it unattended... yeah definitely gonna take a shower when we get back home...

"_Home huh?_"

I suddenly remember to question why I was on the floor in the first place... and of course its Revy, bitch better compensate for medical bills if my cut gets infected.

"Greeaatt..." I sarcastically. "... You guys mind helping me out a b-... fucking ass holes... this place is full of fucking ass holes, figuratively and literally." I mutter. Dutch and Benny thought, again, that it would be hilarious to take all of the stuff the other ass holes left and decided it would also be hilarious to leave me here under a very drunk, blacked out Revy... fucking... ass holes. To make matters worse I realize I still have to carry my knife AND carry Revy... oh and did I mention that I was getting that awkward boner? Yeah... at a time like this... this whole situation is insane I swear.

I start to push Revy off of me and start putting her Cutlasses back to here they belong, I then try to figure out where to put my knife, I take my tie and tie it into a makeshift holster for my knife so I can carry drunk bitch freely without cutting her or myself.

I was about to put her on my back until I was interrupted... yeah I get interrupted a lot I noticed, I wonder how this will affect my love life if I ever get into one...

"Yo Rock, 'member to take your reward before you go, I have a bag right here so it isn't a full hassle since I see you got your hands full already." He smiles warmly at me while having that mischievousness look in his eye, I think I know what he's thinking about but like hell will I question it.

"Alrighty." I say simply. I then heft big bag 'o bitch onto my back and make my way over to the bar. I pick 2 good looking bottles and Bao gets them for me and put's them in a back before handing them to me, I bid farewell and make my way home... which took 15 long fucking minutes holding miss bitch on my back the whole time... I never knew she was a person where sometimes moves while she sleeps, yeah I'm gonna have this black eye for a while I figure.

I finally see the corner I need to turn onto before directly seeing our apartment building... thank god we finally got here. I was suddenly blinded by a light of an approaching car, now its not a weird thing to see a car on the road at night blinding you with its head lights but this one pulled over next to me.

The back right window started to roll down and stopped half way, I started to worry if they were some gang or just some guy wanting some quick cash, either way I had no way of defending myself OR Revy so I just acted like nothing was out of the ordinary and walked up to the car, idiot idea I know but if they wanna mug us I can't really do anything about it and if they are here to kill us and I try to run... only gonna make it 5 feet before our bodies hit the ground so I just went with it and see what they wanted.

"Yo, what's up? Can I help you?"

"Why yes you can, in fact you could help my boss meet you tomorrow whenever you feel like coming, if you have a job, let us know and we will prepare for a later date." A gravely, ominous voice replied through the window.

"I'm sorry but who are you again?" I say confused to low hell. (Hehe see what I did there? I used low hell instead of high heaven hehe... no?... ok... oh wait not ok, fuck you)

"I apologize, I am Boris, Balalaika's second-in-command. She told me to tell you to meet her at Hotel Moscow's HQ, again, whenever you may feel like it but if you have an unexpected job you may contact either us to schedule another date."

"I don't have a problem with talking to her but do did she give you a reason why should would want to talk to me? I haven't done anything to upset Hotel Moscow have I?"

"She told me that if you ask that I should say this, 'How happy are you that you finally have your knife back Ken?'" Time froze for me... how the hell did she know my name? I thought we destroyed everything even mentioning my name, how the FUCK did she find out? As far as people know I'm still Rockuro Okajima (or Okajima Rockuro for those that like the japanese backwards name thing)

"Tell her I'll be stopping by tomorrow, job or not, she has some explaining to do, are we clear on that?" I managed to say.

"Yes. Here is the number in case you decide for another date." He sticks his hand out of the window and hands me a card with a number on it.

"On the back is the code to give to our guards when you arrive, we already gave them a picture of what you look like but with advances in plastic surgery nowadays you will need to memorize that code and burn the card, are WE clear on that?" He said with a tiny amount of amusement in his voice.

"Sure thing." It may sound ridiculous for people to actually get plastic surgery just to impersonate someone for one reason or another but it is purely possible I've seen it done before actually but its very, very expensive and you need a higher than expert plastic surgeon to preform that kind of thing. Its next to impossible but its been done.

"Oh and tell Balalaika that I said 'I'm very happy I have it back... Sofiya.'." I said with a big smile on my face, KNOWING it would piss her off to no end if he actually relays that message.

I could see Boris sweat slightly and I smile again. I could hear him gulp before he starts talking again.

"That would be an unwise decision, she doesn't-." I interrupt him before he could continue. Yeah hows that bitches? I finally interrupt someone, fuck you universe.

"I don't care, just tell her that and we don't have any problems."

"Your funeral." He then taps the seat in front of him and rolls up his window while the car started to go down the road and turn a corner. I myself, make my way towards the apartment like I was doing before.

"Dammit, how did they find out. If she found out there's no telling how many people know as well. Shit, staying here might not have been a good idea after all."

"Hmm? Rock? Where are we? And why am I on your back?" Slurred words came from my right.

"We're almost home Revy, just go back to sleep, you'll be in bed soon."

I only hear snores, indicating she took my words to heart before I even uttered them.

I roll my eyes and make my way inside the apartment building and head for our apartment that we so happen share, yeah we may get along not sometimes but mutual respect and partnership keep us together and she is actually allowing me to stay his her guest bedroom, although I'm starting to consider to move out since I can get next to no privacy and I have to hear her snores just to go to sleep... yeah its fucking retarded that I have to hear bitch's snores just to go to sleep, I tried going to sleep one time on the boat since me and Revy had a little disagreement... yeah couldn't get a wink of sleep that night. To make my image even worse, I had to beg... BEG Revy to let me have the guest bed again without her shooting me for the little disagreement we had the other day, when I was able to I slept like a baby... fuck I'm pathetic, if dad could see me he would be so disappointed I'd think he disown me. Oh well.

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Morning, next day. (Was one am when they finally got to their apartment so I guess 'Next day' doesn't really fit but fuck it, I don't care and I don't think you do either)

"Revy..." Right now i'm standing in my usual blood red shirt, black tie, black pants and of course black shoes. What i'm DOING is trying to wake up Ms. Bitch, coffee is done and I don't think she likes hangovers anymore than I do... and I loathe them... I really do but the way we get drunk is so worth it, sorta.

"Mmmph, go away." A muffled reply came from the pillow she had her head buried into.

"How about no? It's time to wake up, I have coffee ready and I have somewhere to be and I don't like you being here by yourself... you could get us into unwanted trouble, have an assassin kill you while you're still sleeping comfortably, and possibly set fire to this place."

"Rock... Jesus you're still going on about that? It was only a tiny fire." Revy finally rolled over to face me.

"Yeah... it was and im glad I came in when I did or else you would have had the dishonor of getting killed by a fire you set... by accident... while you were sleeping."

"Oh fuck off, i'm getting up. You said you needed to be somewhere, where you going?" She inquired while getting up and sluggishly putting on her pants... well if you could even call them pants I mean seriously I think she WANTS people to look at her with lecherous gazes... I know I do... FROM TIME TO TIME NOW ALL THE TIME YOU BASTARDS! I mean can you blame me? It rides up that perfect little crack and sometimes, accidentally, when she sits I can see a little bit of her panties, and sometimes lack thereof.

"I have business that I need to attend to but rest assured its nothing dangerous... well it could be dangerous depending on how it goes but that's besides the point. In fact I need to leave right now, they said I could be there at anytime so I guess they don't mind me barging in at 10 in the AM. Well barging in would be bad... could get shot before I even utter a word." I muse. I drink the last of my coffee and take an aspirin, great combination for getting rid of a hangover headache I know.

"Since you're not telling me where you're going, if you get kidnapped don't expect us coming to get you." She says in a condescending tone, god I hate that tone... makes me want to throw the coffee mug I have in my hand at her... but no that would be bad.

"Yeah, yeah I know. I'm not going to get kidnapped, its just going to be a semi-friendly conversation. I'll be back by at least 12 or so, if we get a job before I get back, you have my cell number." I say as I open the door to our apartment.

"Hey Rock..."

"Yeah?" I peek my head through the doorway.

"Be careful, and im not saying that because I worry about you, i'm saying it because i'm not gonna save your ass if you get kidnapped."

"Yup, yup got it queen bit- *ahem* bee. Thanks... I guess." I finally close the door and make my out of the apartment and head in the direction of Hotel Moscow's HQ.

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At Hotel Moscow...

I walk up to the entrance gate to the building with 2 armed guards on either side of it.

"Hey, hi, hello, names Okajima Rockuro A.K.A Rock, Balalaika invited me here for a friendly chat. Boris gave me the code to enter in case you guys still don't trust me." I say the code.

The guard on the right looked towards the one on the left and nodded.

With a heavy russian accent he says. "Go inside, another guard will escort you to Kapitan. Don't make any trouble, you'll be shot if you do, guest or not." He says threateningly.

"Sure, sure thanks again." The gate opens and I walk through and make my way to the big double door building.

I put my hand on the handle ready to turn it when it open by itself.

"Sweet." I mutter. I then see another armed guard 5 feet away from the door motioning me to follow him. I decided against small talk since I don't think he would appreciate it.

After about 5 minutes of walking we finally made it to 'Kapitan's' office, he knocks on it, I think in a code, and Boris, the guy from last night, opens it.

"Ah, Rock, didn't expect you here so early, come in, she is expecting you. And she is pissed so be careful." He whispers the last part to me, I think I know why she's pissed. He then makes his way out of the room and closes the door with an audible 'click'

"Hey Balalaika, you said you wanted to talk? Here I am. You have some explaining to do." I say as I walk up to the desk. The high back chair she is in, the back is facing me. Then the chair slowly turns around. (Classic clitché I know but hey it works) I see Balalaika smiling creepily and a TT-30 in her right hand.

"Ah Ken, how nice of you to show up early. I apologize for the sudden talk but once I found out who you were I just couldn't help myself." She smiles sweetly, it is SOOOO creepy.

"Well lets start this 'friendly' chat with a question... how the hell do you know my name? Any record of me was destroyed and all that was left was Okajima Rockuro. The only way you got that information is from the inside, who the hell ratted me out? Oh and how the hell did you find my knife? Thank you for bringing it back by the way." I say as I finally sit in the chair in front of the desk.

"I will answer your questions, but first I would like to address that you called me by my name... something no one should do." She finally drops the smile and stand up pointing the gun at my head.

"You're mad about that? Really? Come on, you give me back my knife and say 'How happy are you to have it back... Ken?' and NOT expect something in return? You are an idiot if I ever saw one."

She smirks and puts the gun back into the desk drawer be for sitting back down.

"I recall you having questions that you want answered, correct?" She puts her hands into a Mr. Burn's 'Excellent' manner... (typical villain pose I know but it fits yeah?)

"If you mean the ones I JUST asked then yes." I nod my head a little bit.

"I know you're name because your father told me. As for your knife it was actually in some rich guy's sword/knife collection, took some time to find and *ahem* persuasion to let us have it."

"That's awesome and all and thank you for that but... Dad? How the hell did he let you have that information?"

"Simple, we go way back, in fact he helped me and my men during the war, I knew I recognized you from somewhere when you first got here but I couldn't remember exactly where from. So I came back here and pulled out this photo your father gave me after I had a talk with him." She proceeds to pull out my military file with my name on it... oh and the past I talked about was complete bullshit... well not COMPLETE but I left a few details out which I will explain to you at some point in time.

"Interesting... what did Daddy say about me?" I hold onto the file, not really trusting her since she could sell this baby to someone with enough cash.

"He told me to tell you, if I ever saw you, 'Did you complete your assignment?'"

"You can tell him that Investigation Department Chief Kageyama is dead, the plane he was about to leave Ronapur on had a 'malfunction' and had to stay at one of the motels in the town before it could get fixed... I made it look like someone shot him and took his valuables... classic mugging and no one suspects a thing, the company was informed of his unfortunate demise." I say in an almost robotic way.

"He also said if you did complete your assignment, 'Good job... but why the hell are you staying in Ronapur'... he asks."

"I'm quitting the family business for a more fun and exciting job, being a member of Lagoon Company, being an assassin and carrying out your contracts is fun and all but its slow, with Lagoon Company we can kill without a second thought and no one bats an eye, perfect for people like us and bad for people who are in our way." Dark tone activated.

Balalaika sighs at this. "He's not going to be happy about it, he may leave you alone for awhile but he will send assassin's for you and your friend to see if you being he is either helping you or detrimental to your career."

"Eh whatever, I'll take care of them, of course Dad will be mad if I kill them so I'll just use non-lethal but very painful techniques on them."

"Good job my boy, if you wish to stay there, it is as Balalaika said, I will send people after to see whether you made the right choice." An ominous voice spoke through the phone, on speaker on the desk.

"Oh hey Dad, I didn't know you were on the phone I mean even I can miss the red light blinking repeatedly ever since I came in. I hope I didn't interrupt a conversation on my entry." I say sarcastically.

"I swear your sarcasm will be your downfall but nonetheless good work, your money will be in your account if you can even access it on that shit stained island, no offense to you and your men Balalaika, I'm sure you are doing a good job but even you have to admit its a shit stain."

"I do admit it but the mafia apparently wants this place and I have no objection to it, in fact its actually making good profits."

My father laughs.

"By the way, Dad?"

"Yes?"

"Why the fuck did you give her my file? You seriously don't think no one can infiltrate this place for some reason and magically find MY file in her desk? What if someone who hates me finds it and brings it back to their bosses? I mean come on... can I at least destroy this? No offense to you Balalaika but I don't trust anyone with my file... no matter how well I know them." I grip my file tighter.

She smiles. "None taken Ro- Ken..." She smiles a little bit wider. "...I understand your situation and you may destroy that file if you wish, its only a copy, your father still has the real one but... could you do me the biggest favor you can give me in return for me allowing you to take your file?"

Ok she's nearly steeping on a lego field with that kind of talk, its MY file i'll do whatever the fuck I want with it, not hers...

"What kind of 'Big' favor are we talking about here?"

"I wish to employ you as our 'Go-to' assassin in case we need someone to disappear. Can you do that for us?"

"Eh... I don't know... how big of targets are we talking?"

"500,000 for bosses, 100,000 for officers and 1,000 for any goons that are just being a nuisance."

I whistle. "Alright sure that's completely fine but... can't your men do goons? Seems a little much to call ME to take out some goons."

"Well of course we can do all of that but my men aren't as skilled in covering their tracks and you are, we don't exactly want to start wars because of a little piece of evidence that it was us, that's why I want you, no ones knows who you are and may just think that your someone else lap dog." She smirks a little bit.

"Ok, 1. I accept. 2. call me lap dog again and your body is going out that window. 3. Hey Dad could you tell mom I got my knife back? Or does she already know?"

"I heard you sweety, have fun with it and make sure you don't lose it again like last time or else I'm going to hang your by your balls~." My mother said sweetly. Yeah its a family heirloom, they were pretty mad when I lost it the first time.

"Y-yeah I understand mother, not going to happen again." Just then my cell phone rings. Its Revy.

"Hello?"

"Yo Rock we got a job, get your ass over here pronto it pays good so I actually want to get this done."

"Alright I'm on my way." I end the call and look back over to Balalaika.

"I suppose you need to leave?"

"Yeah, got a job. See ya later, Mom and Dad."

"Bye son."

"Bye sweety and remember to not lose your knife and be sure to use it as often as possible, oh and don't get caught."

"Yeah, got it, bye."

They hang up and I bid farewell to Balalaika and make my way to my apartment to get my knife since I didn't take it with me. I then make my way towards the dock to see what kind of job we have today.

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**Hope you liked this chapter of Demon of the East :D I know I know 'Where the heck you've been man?' I've been busy so I hope you like this 6000 word chapter XD I've been coming up with more and more ideas of how this story will turn out :D but anyway be sure to review since I would LOVE feed back :D like my latest guest comment on the sex scenes which I am considering so be sure to watch for that and with that I bid you adieu :D **


	4. Chapter 4

**OMG OMG OMG OMG I AM SO SORRY PEOPLEZ OF THE INTERNET Q_Q you must have thought something happened to me right? You were afraid I might have left this world right?... no?... ok... wait no NOT ok... FUCK YOU IF NOT *****mutters*** **ungrateful bastards... *****normal*** ** ANYWAY back on topic, I am sorry I haven't updated in like 20+ days Q_Q I have just been VERY VERY VERY busy and haven't had the wonderful thing we call time to write anything Q_Q BUT I AM BACK AND AM SURELY ALIVE! Anyway, you wonderful but ungrateful bastards have a new chapter to read :D so yippy ki yay to you :D enjoy this wonderful chapter that I have bestowed upon you and BASK IN MY GREATNESS! **

**Disclaimer .: Oh and btw, whatever ass hole thought it would be funny to not make me the creator of Black Lagoon... is an ass hole through and through... they are such an ass hole I had to say it twice... thrice now I guess...**

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"You're sleeping outside." Revy said with narrowed eyes.

"Bullshit I am cause hey it's not my fault that they started shooting at us, in fact _you_ were the one who had to provoke them." I reply.

"Well if you would have hurried it up with the business man bullshit fuckery then I wouldn't have had to!" Revy put's her foot on the coffee table and pushes her large ass forehead against mine, I respond in kind by pushing back... hard.

She pushes back even harder but I sidestep so she falls over on the other side.

"_YOU GOT WHAT YOU DESERVERED YOU PSYCHOTIC BITCH, although I don't have much room to talk since I can be a psychotic bastard sometimes but oh well."_

"But we got paid good money like you said over the phone so it's all ok."

"Rock you fucking bastard you are so definitely sleeping outside." She gets back up and puts a hand to her forehead.

"Whatever, you should be happy we got paid good money AND you killed people, frankly I don't understand why you're so upset." I say while shrugging.

"I'm fucking pissed because you got in my way when I was about to shoot and caused me to lose aim, so when you finally got out of my way I WAS THE ONE THAT GOT SHOT YOU ASS MUNCHER!" She grabbed my collar and pulled me towards her.

"Well if I wanted to die by a fucking grenade then I would have stayed there but last time I check I AM ACTUALLY SANE ENOUGH TO DECIDE AGAINST DYING THIS EARLY IN LIFE!" I yell right back.

She lets go of my shirt collar and pushes me onto the couch.

"Tsk. You don't have to sleep outside but you better be fucking ready to be my bitch for the next few days." She said with smirk.

"Oh fuck you Revy, like I'm being you're bitch when you're one yourself..." I then remember I said that out loud. "... ugh, fuck me..." I facepalm and look through the cracks of my fingers to see Revy already holding her gun to my head. She's been doing that so many times now I don't even register it to the point to get out of the way but like hell will I ever be relaxed at having a gun pointed in my general direction...

"You're my bitch for the next few week's just for saying that... congrats, you got the most high honor of serving the most honorable and sexy Revy for the next few weeks... ok well not honorable but sexy as hell." She put away her gun and grabbed a bacardi from the table and downed the rest of it, it was half empty FYI.

We hear a knock at the door and before I could say or do anything, Revy beat me to it.

"Being my bitch entitles me to telling you whatever the fuck I want you to do and you do it right away, first order of business as my bitch is to answer the door. MY BITCH IS ON HER WAY!" She said the last part when we heard the knock again.

"_I'm going to seriously kill her one of the days, I swear to god I will..."_

"Yes mistress." The sarcasm is strong with this one, mmm yes, indeed.

She suddenly got a thoughtful look, which I was suddenly afraid of for some reason but didn't have time to dwell on it since there was another knock with me saying 'I'm fucking coming you jackasses!'

I open the door to see Dutch and Benny.

"Oh sup guys. Come on in." I say whiling moving to the side to let them in.

They make their way towards the couch and sit on it, staring at Revy when she wouldn't respond to either of the.

"Oi, Rock." Dutch said.

"Yeah?"

"At any point in time that we got back from our last job, did Revy break?"

"Not that I know of, she suddenly went like that when I went to answer the door OH DEAR JESUS!" I screamed the last part like a man *cough like a pussy you mean cough* since Revy suddenly got all up in my face with the wickedest grins I've seen on her face.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"I like waffles!" Benny shouts.

Before we addressed the Revy... thing... we looked at Benny.

"Don't mind him, he walked by some building with so much weed smoke coming out of it you thought the building was on fire, so don't mind him." Dutch says.

"Ah." Me and Revy say at the same time.

"And what the fuck Revy, why'd you suddenly appear like a creeper all up in my face... that's creepy as hell."

"Ah, I wanted to say I liked you calling me Mistress... call me it from now on bitch."

"Oh dear god..." I facepalm again, with an even louder smack and a red hand print on my face.

Dutch said nothing but raise an eyebrow.

"It's because I messed up her aim during the firefight that she got shot in the arm, well grazed but anyway she thinks I owe her for it and now I'm apparently her 'Bitch' for the next few weeks, it was a few days but I called her the bitch so now it's a few weeks... yay me." I say to Dutch as to avoid any weirdness if he took it the wrong way.

"Oh, ok then." He said coolly... fucking ass hole has no sympathy whatsoever.

"So what can we help you guy's with? You obviously came here for a reason." I say.

Revy sat back down on the couch... well more like jumped and landed in a so called 'Sexy' pose and laid on her side with her left hand holding up her head, her left leg extended with the couch and her right knee facing the ceiling. All that while coolly looking over her nails.

I meanwhile sit down on the chair she previously occupied while we were argu- *ahem* ...talking things out.

"We actually have another job." He starts.

"Already? We JUST finished one, can't people just NOT call at any point in time when we actually don't want to do work?" Revy says.

"Well the job doesn't start in about 3 days so we can relax for now, pretty high paying job at that as well, 500,000 for just transporting a package... a live one." He, again, coolly says.

"Live one eh? How old we talking about? Young we can deal with but any older than 13 will be a tiny bit of a problem, not that we couldn't take care of it but it would be a pain in the ass to deliver the package broken... in several places."

"Well that's a little dark for you Rock, almost sounds you have experience with this type of thing. Guess being here with us in this god forsaken place is rubbing off on ya huh?" Revy says will smoking the cigarette she took out during Dutch's explanation about the job.

"_Oh she has no idea kukuku..." _ I snicker.

"Possibly..." I shrug. "... Anyway, again, how old we talkin about?"

"12." (I checked the wiki on him and it said 12 to 13 in his first appearance so I just went with 12, don't ask why, I just felt like it :P)

"Oh, alright... yeah that fine as long as he doesn't do something stupid to warrant a certain someones bullets." I suggestively say.

"Duuudddeee'sss... I see... sounds... I think I just saw my own voice... HOLY CRAP DUDE I CAN SEE IT NOW...THERE IT IS AGAIN... AND AGAIN...AND AGAIN...AND AGA-" Benny was cut off from saying any more since he was mercifully, knocked unconscious by the bitch.

"Ouch, I don't think he needed that last kick Revy..."

"He grabbed my ass on the way down Rock, what kind of lady would I be if I didn't do that?"

"I never knew you were a lady... a shemale possibly but a lady?... Nah can't see it. Besides I bet it was accidental, with him falling and all and not wanting to fall I bet he tried to grab the closest thing to him." I deadpan.

"He could have grabbed my shirt or something! Not my ass! I know hes horny and all with him being a super geek and rarely finding pussy but to stoop so low as to grab MY ass? Come on man!" She tried to reason. Which also failed horribly by the way if you hadn't noticed.

"You do know that you just insulted yourself right?" I question with narrowed, skeptical eyes.

"And?"

"Ok, nevermind then."

"I'm hungry."

"There's left overs in the fridge."

"Wheres Dutch?" Random subject's... random subject's everywhere.

"Oh he left once we started talking, said something bout 'Needing a drink' and 'Fucking headache' you'd think that he would get some kind of medication for the headache or something. Haven't heard of an alcohol that doesn't NOT give you a headache in the morning, personal experience if I may add to that."

"Don't wanna eat left overs." She flops on the couch in an exasperated and drama filled manner.

"Whatever am I to do?" She adds and puts her right forearm onto her, *mumble big as an ass mumble*, forehead.

"I don't know... and frankly I don't care." I gave her a deadpan look just to top it off.

"Come on, take your lazy ass you call a brain and think up of something fun to do... i'm bored as fuck and want something to do... did I also mention i'm bored as fuck and want something to do? I don't think I have yet so I'll tell you. I'M BORED AS FUCK AND WANT SOMETHING TO DO!" She half yells.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it already, dear god just stop!" I half yell back.

She sticks her fucking tongue out at me... yeah REAL mature... bitch... i'm gonna pull a Revy and say, did I mention she was a bitch? Cause I don't think I have, so let me tell you. SHE'S A BITCH!

"Yellow Flag?" I suggest first.

"Nah, not in the mood." She looks at her nails again in a bored fashion.

"Since when is any girl EVER in the mood for anything whatsoever?" I mutter.

"What'd you say ass hole?" She narrow's her eyes at me.

"Nothing, nothing, jeez calm your period down." I roll my eyes as I say this.

"Oh go fuck yourself with the horse dildo you have stashed in your closet."

"Um the last time I checked, I'm not into that sort of thing and like hell would I stick anything up my ass and who the FUCK stashed a horse dildo in my closet?" I ask the world.

"Dude you seriously don't have one do you? Cause I was just kiddin bout the horse dildo thing, if you really do have one then could I borrow it for nefarious purposes against a certain blond haired fake nun?" She asks slightly hopeful.

I stare at her blankly for the umpteenth time in our working together.

"No... because I DON'T FUCKING HAVE ONE!..." I put a hand to my chin. "... And is this certain blond haired fake nun happen to be Eda? You know, the crazy bitch we happened to meet at that obviously fake Church a few days ago? Cause honestly I would not mind buying one just to see that happen." I nod a little bit with the 'Not bad' face.

(A/N: You know the 'Not bad' face from that one Obama meme, if not then just look it up and you'll see what I'm talking about since I don't know that certain facial expression.)

"_Well there's THAT description then there's the CIA profile she has... *_insert Kermit drinking Lipton Tea here_* But that's none of my business." _He thoughtfully added in.

At first she stares at me blankly then proceeds to get up and walk over towards me... not liking to where this is going I try to think of what I said wrong until she put's her hands on my shoulders and bends a little so we're face to face and says the following:

"There may be hope for you yet Rock. Keep shit like that up and you and I will be great friends cause, hahaha, fucking hell was that hilarious." She then starts laughing like a maniac and I look at her like she just broke and forgot how to Revy but hey that just may just be me since I know next to fuck about her since all I got on her profile was the basic shit, not a whole fucking character profile.

"Ok so you wanna go do that? Cause that sounds fun right now." I chuckle while saying that.

"Sure lets do it, if it's to get payback then HELL YEAH I'M IN!" She pumps her fist in the air.

"You're paying though since it was you're idea." I quickly say, if I didn't then I would have to be the one buying the damn thing and I don't want to mess up what little rep I have on this island, with Revy though, no one is gonna give to shits about what she buy's hell I wouldn't be surprised if people (mostly women) look at her in awe and go 'WTFBBQ? SHE CAN ACTUALLY TAKE ALL THAT? Maybe I should give it a go... *bites lip*'

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On the way to the Church an hour later since they didn't have a car and had to walk to the store and get the damn horse dildo and then walk to the Church...

"Ok, I just thought of something." I slightly frown and tilt my head to the side.

"Yeah, what's that?" She took one last drag from her cigarette, before finally throwing it on the ground.

"What are gonna do with the... thing." I gesture towards the plastic bag in Revy's hands that had, in pink bold letter's, 'Thanks for shopping at the adult super store. Come back again for all your sexual needs!'

Revy suddenly stops and looks ahead blankly, me being the adorable ass hole that I am, stuck a hand out in front of Revy's face to see if she finally broke. Unfortunately that wasn't the case and smacked my hand away... dammit, no dice.

"I didn't get that far..." She says while finally starting to move again.

I'm just staring at her back with my mouth slightly open. If I stood like that for a few more minutes I think a bird would have made a good little next in my mouth or some fly laid its eggs there... which is NOT a good picture to think up... *shudder's*

I finally catch up to her and say: "Really Revy? Come on... we went through all the trouble just to buy that... uncomfortable to sit on, looking thing... and not know what to do with it?"

"Well I just now came up with an idea..."

"Ok, mind telling me what it is?"

"Well, this isn't definite and could be changed at some point in time but I was thinking..."

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(A/N: I just wanted to say for this brief section its going into third person and looking at Eda... possibly in a sexy way too, whatever you prefer...)

Eda just got back from a delivery and was exhausted from having to smack, shoot knee caps and bash head's in since almost every single guy at the exchange either groped her and the women she was with in one of way or another and may have said things even she was wary of doing in the privacy of the bedroom.

Currently she and the girls she was with (which was with 4 others) were in the Church's small locker room to change from their nun outfit's into Civies.

"Can you believe those guy's? I mean I know this is Ronapur but... damn." The girl to Eda's right said.

"I hear yeah sister." Eda said... pun so intended I can't even describe it.

"Me too." The girl to the left said.

"You shooting them probably stopped them from doing business with us in the future Eda, I don't think Sister Yolanda is gonna like that." The girl to the back left of her said. Eda just started thinking of what to say back while putting her shirt on.

"Once she hears what they did I don't think she's gonna mind, they went far beyond what is acceptable in the 'Look but don't touch' department." She quipped.

"But... the didn't just look, they touched... in various places." The girl to the right back deadpanned.

"My point exactly." Just then as she was about to reach for her pants, she saw something of a pink and black variety protruding from the right pant leg.

"The hell is this?" Eda goes to grab it and pulls it out, not expecting it to be a pretty long horse dildo, intended for certain purposes of both genders. (A/N: I say that since guys, unfortunately are into that shit as well... and frankly I couldn't give to shit's about it but it still irks me that something that big can painfully fit into a place so small... *shudders in disgust*)

A series of gasps ring out from all around Eda and she stares at the thing. For a split second she forgot how to Eda.

"Wow Eda... you must be pretty stretchy to take all of that... you sure you can go back to live dick after you've had your fun with that?" The one to the right says.

"I wouldn't..." The one to the left says.

"HA! My boyfriend has one right under his bed, fun to play with once he's done with me... fucker falls asleep right after and leaves me unsatisfied." The one to the back left said.

"Really? When did he buy it for you?" The back right said.

"I don't remember him saying anything about it, I just found it after he kicked me off the bed after he fell asleep after the 3rd round of love making, back then he was such a gentleman and leaving me satisfied first before he focused on himself. Anyway after he fell asleep he kicked me off, as I said before, and I found it just lying there, I tried it out... as quietly as I could and have never been more satisfied in my whole life." She then sighed dreamily.

"Uhh... you said he never mentioned it and it was there before you... right?" The girl to Eda's right inquired.

"Yeah, why?"

The 3 girls exchanged looks before the left one addressed the oblivious girl behind her.

"He either has a side girlfriend or... he... uses it..." She trails off.

"Huh? What're you talk...ing...about... holy fuck... oh dear god! EW EW EW EW EW!" She screamed.

Just then Eda remembered how to Eda.

"WHO THE FUCK PUT THIS HERE! WAS IT ONE OF YOU BITCHES? YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY? DEAR JESUS!" Eda screamed and pointing a heated glare to each of the girls.

"We didn't put it there!" They yelled in near perfect unison.

(A/N: I know you're probably getting tired of all these AN's but I just wanted to point out the Ronapur has a lot of sexual situations everywhere amiright? I mean... damn...)

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(Back into 1st person view)

"Hahahaha oh my fucking god! Hahahaha! That was too good!" Revy was on the floor laughing in their apartment look at the computer screen with Eda nearly pulling out her gun to see which one would spill the truth first. She apparently didn't like the joke.

I myself was laughing along with her, albeit a lot less than what she was doing but I was nonetheless laughing and giggling like an idiot. After we put the disgusting thing into Eda's locker, we put up a camera in the room since being there physically for the reaction would be too dangerous and our chances of getting caught were 100%. And I might have suggested the camera idea to Revy for both saving our hides and possibly having some good material for later in the night... I'm a guy on an island with it nearly reaking of sex and you think I'm not gonna do anything about it? Oh hookers? Yeah no... I don't do that... too many risks and I'm not about to waste money just to get one checked and ultimately having the worst experience of my life, camera's FTW.

Thank god its my laptop we're using... whew.

"Oh man that is hilarious. Think she'll ever figure out it was you?"

"You mean us and yes I think she will sooner or later but I don't give a fuck, serve's the bitch right since she stuck her gun in my face."

"You stuck your gun in her face too you know."

"Whatever..."

"I... am going to bed, gonna go out shopping for a few things tomorrow and I want to be extra rested as to not get ripped off cause I was just a teeny bit tired."

"You already went shopping for food didn't you?" She questioned.

"Yeah, but I never said anything bout shopping for food. I may have this epic as hell knife to use but you know the saying 'Never bring a knife to a gun fight' granted with the right training anyone can kill everyone with a knife and no one able to fire a single round at ya." I reply.

"But you don't have training like that do you?"

"Pfft what gives you that idea?" Slightly afraid she saw through my fake mask, I don't want to reveal who I am just yet...

She looks thoughtful for a moment. "Yeah you're right, you're too much of a wimp to have that kind of training, even if you did and I saw it happen I still wouldn't believe it and would instead think that someone cloned you and changed you to the point where your the super soldier every country is trying make. Failing miserably at that if I might add."

"_You have no idea how wrong you are... well except the cloning and changing on the genetic level thing... that's too ridiculous as to be true..."_

"Well yeah there's that and since I only have a knife and we keep getting into fire fights BECAUSE OF A CERTAIN BRUNETTE I'm going to need a gun sooner or later, killing may not be my thing but like hell will i die without a fight."

"Spoken like a true man, Rock... my opinion of you is changing as the days go by, keep it up and I may consider you an actual asset to this company."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence." I say dryly.

"Night... panty mountain douche-bag." She snickers before closing the door to her bedroom.

"THE FIRST THING I'M GOING TO DO IS SHOOT YOU WHEN I GET MY GUN, I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL." I yell just loud enough to make her hear me behind her door.

All I could make out from the other side of the door was 'Would like to see you try' and just more laughing.

"Bitch is gonna pay I swear to god... it wasn't even my doing in the first place... bitch..." I mumble and grumble as I pick up my computer and head to my bedroom, shutting the light out to the main rooms and turning on my light, I notice on the screen that all the girls left except the ones that were on Eda's left and right... doing... things that everyman wishes to see in person... fuck sleep, I haven't rubbed off a good one in WEEKS and it doesn't look like they're stopping anytime soon either... thank god for headphones...

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**Sooo yeah... sorry bout the whole wait, as I said before i've been super busy the past few weeks and the past 5 days I've been on again off again writing this chapter and redoing a few things here and there since I had writers block, this is more filler than anything since the next chapter is where Roberta is going to introduced 'n shit. I made this chapter er filler more about Rock (or Ken as some call him) and Revy's relationship since a certain review wanted to see that happen and I myself wholeheartedly agree and I think this was a pretty good filler don'tcha think? And I know... not that much stuff happened but hey this is a filler, the real chapter is going to be the next one and I intend to make it longer if I can.**

**I have SOOO many idea's as to how to go into the story, oh and Rock's (Ken's) siblings (like 3 I think... 2 brothers and 1 sister right? Gonna have to recheck the chapter I talked about them in) Yeah not very professional of a writer to forget things he writes I know but hey i'm sorta new to this thing and I haven't written in awhile so shad ap! Oh and have a good morning/afternoon/evening :D you wonderful bastards...**


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey Dutch, quick question." Revy said.

"Yeah, Revy?" Dutch said while steering the PT Boat back to Roanapur.

"Can I kill this kid? Yeah, we'll be down 500K but at the moment I don't give a fuck." She say's deceptively calm.

"No Revy, you may not kill the kid. The Cartel will be on our ass's if we do, I don't exactly need a bad rep AND the Cartel coming after my beautiful black ass."

"UUUUGGGGHHHH!... Fine." She say's, muttering at the end.

"Why do you want to kill him?" I don't exactly know what happened since it was Benny who had to drag the bitch out of the room she and the 'Package' were staying in. It was in the nick of time too since she was about to shoot the kid in the face... several times... with her pistol... namely her beretta... make that two... she named them her Cutlasses... ok I'll stop now.

Anyway, it was finally the day of the job, we set out for a freighter which was quite a ways from Roanapur since it was a simple drop off and then back on to wherever they were originally headed. We picked up the kid no problem and had no problem's since... but apparently something happened in that room and I wanna find out.

"Revy, what did the kid do? Jeez, he's been on the boat, what? 30 minutes? Why are you trying to kill him?" I ask.

"The little fucktard threw his opened soda can at me when I offered it to him with the pizza... I'M GONNA KILL YOU, YA HEAR?!" She yelled.

Oh... ok... i'm gonna be totally honest hear and say I wasn't expecting that, I was expecting worse actually, like you know... touching a woman somewhere dangerous? Ok well not dangerous are those area's per say but dangerous is the woman who was touched... *shudder's*

"Don't be so loud, jeez." Dutch say's over his shoulder.

"Tch." Her trademark ladies and gentlemen, bask in the glow of it.

"*sigh* Fine I'll go look after the kid if he's that much of a hassle for you."

As I was about to grab the handle to the room, I was stopped by a hand on my shoulder, Revy's hand.

"Rock." She say's seriously.

"Y-yes?" I'm not scared of her but she's a little too close for comfort since she's all in my face... did she ever hear of the word's 'Personal Space'? Apparently not I guess...

"Be careful, that demon spawn is a bastard so I just want you to know that if you come across any trouble with him... let me know, I have a few bullets that want a word with him." She gripped my shoulder and flashed me a thumbs up with her other hand and a toothy grin which by the way I could have totally sworn, twinkled... yeah... like what the fuck?

"O-ok? Thanks? I guess?"

She then nods and goes back to where she was standing before and ate her sandwich and drank her beer with new found vigor.

I then shake my head since I was still processing Revy... like what the fuck man? Teeth aren't supposed to sparkle, not unless it computerized god damn it, ITS JUST NOT PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE! Anyway I shake my head, as I said... heh that rhymed... and go inside the room where the little 'Demon spawned bastard' is, cute kid if I do say so myself, no I am not a pedo in any way, shape, or form, hes a cute kid what can I say?

"Hey buddy, heard what you did to my friend, not very nice since she was a nice lady and actually gave you something to eat and drink..." I grab the chair, which I guess Revy was sitting in, and reverse sat in it. (You know, like how you face the back of the chair and lean on it? Yeah that pose) "... Now I don't know about you but that sounds to me like your a little ungrateful for what she provided you with. I bet my family's heirloom that no other transport of any kind would give you such a nice service." I lightly scold.

Apparently the kid has a death wish since he threw his uneaten pizza slice at me... in my face... the little bastard is gonna get it I swear, I am so close to calling Revy in here and asking her to join me in a little shootout staring us as the shooters and the little bastard as our target... at 5 feet just to make sure every bullet hit's.

But I decide to be the bigger man and grab a napkin that was also offered to him with the food and drink, lightly throw the pizza at the opposite wall and proceed to wipe my face off.

"*heavy sigh* Kid... you are really pushing it, we haven't done anything bad and will do NOTHING bad as long as you keep your shit together and don't do shit like that again. We are a transport company that brush's with the law sometimes but we take pride in our delivery capability. So make sure to not do shit like that again and we'll be sure not to shoot you and throw you over board, reward be damned." I say seriously.

The kid noticeably gulps and says nothing but nod.

"Good, I guess I should start by saying sorry for my over enthusiastic friend earlier, she more... lively than the rest of our little group. Name's Rockuro Okajima, yours?" I ask while holding a hand out.

The kid doesn't say anything for moment but then grabs my hand.

"Garcia Lovelace." He say's, nearly a whisper.

"Nice to meet you Garcia." I instantly knew of that name, not Garcia but Lovelace, can't place where I heard it though, I mean I know of it like I know the family but there's something in the back of my mind that's nagging at me that I should know... oh well it can't bee too important but damn is it gonna bug the hell outta me.

"You're not like the tattooed bitch or the black man, you seem... normal I guess." He say's, a little hesitant as first but manages to get it out.

"_Kid, if only you knew. Kukukukuku." _I chuckle darkly, on the inside since chuckling darkly on the outside would look creepy and make the kid think I was a pedo or something... yeah can't have pedo tarnishing what name I have.

Then I realize what he called Revy.

"Kid." I say seriously, he gulps again at my tone.

"Y-y-yes?"

"You and I are gonna be best of friends..." I pat him on his shoulder. "... you calling Revy the 'Tattooed bitch', classic."

"Um... thanks? I guess?"

I nod and go back to my previous position on the chair.

We sit in silence for a while before he asks me a question.

"Do you know where I'm going? Or who I'm being sold to?"

"The Cartel. Why? Ya worried?"

"No..." He then smiles. "... My father, Diego Jose San Fernando Lovelace will save me, hes one of the thirteen great families of South America and I so happen to be his only son. After he passes on, I'll be head of the family."

"Oh? You seem pretty sure of yourself there. If you're after pity then stop wasting your breath, won't find any here."

"Pity? Why would I need pity from the likes of you people?" He says with an almost smug face. That offer from Revy sounds pretty good right now...

"Well... you're a pretty unlikeable kid, if this is how you behaved with the Cartel then I'm hella surprised they didn't shoot you in the face, repeatedly. But since you're family is last on the 'Great Family' list then I guess I can't be too surprised." That... was a fact.

He brings his legs up to his chest and proceeds to put his head down between them.

"Well... things haven't been going our way lately but we're getting by. He's a good man, never did anything on the side and always wanted to go up the ranks the legit way. Business isn't good but the plantations are doing ok. But then the mafia came."

"Oh really? What happened?" I'm actually curious as to what happened since I haven't been to South America is what? 3 or 4 years? I don't remember. I then get my smokes out but as I was about to light it I decide against it, smoke ain't good for kids. I may have killed kids back in the day but they were the kind that nobody would care if they died. You know the run of the mill 'I own this and I own that, you have to do what I say' sort of kids so I didn't give two shits about their lives but this kid right here... I can tell hes a good kid even though hes a little bit of a bastard.

"At first they tried to negotiate and buy the land from Dad but he refused, they conducted a geological test that said, where we were living had lanthanides but Dad still refused. They then showed their true selves and harassed my father's farm's but, like the good man he is, still refused. So I'm guessing that why I'm here."

"Huh... if I was any other person I would have said you were lying from the start but I'm not any other person... but I still need confirmation." I say seriously. Like holy crap everyone and everything is doing stuff so seriously... jeez... everyone needs to take a chill pill.

"What do you want to know?"

"The Lovelace family has a dog, what do you know about it?" I did some *ahem* 'work' over in South America a while back so even though the noble family's weren't my target, I still looked them up just in case, even the Lovelace family even though I doubt they would bee a threat. Heh they even only had one maid that I could see but for some reason it doesn't say who it was, strange now that I think about it, gonna have to keep that in the back of my mind where its going so crazy it's like a frat party with no restrictions...

"That's easy. He became a part of our family six years ago. His name is Lazlo, he's a white furred Volpino Italiano." (I'm copying some lines from the subbed version on gogoanime so I don't know how accurate this stuff is although I would think its accurate, but if not please tell me and I'll change it accordingly)

"Huh... alright I believe you kid. I'll be right back though, I'm gonna ask my fellow co-workers something real quick." I then get up and open the door then close it behind me. I start walking back to the hatch that open's up to the Captain's chair... thing, I don't what you call it hell I almost said pilot seat so whatever, just roll with it.

I open the hatch to see Revy was walking my way before I opened the hatch and heard her say.

"Told you. With eyes just like that." What the fuck? Did they KNOW I was on my way here? What the fuck man? They psychic or something? And what about my eyes?... bitch...

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After explaining the situation to them...

"Well that's odd. I don't really like how this feel's." Dutch say's.

"We should probably wait until we dock to give him to the mafia. The Cartel were fucking bastard's and lied to us. And if my gut say's anything, it's saying that if they're lying, there's trouble ahead." I say.

"Rock." I hear the distinct sound of a gun cocking. I hate that word... I really do... who the fuck saying 'The gun cocked' or something? Doesn't that sound sexual as fuck?

"Yes?" I turn to look at her while she flipping her prized possession.

"Don't have pity for our packages. You're gonna feel like shit, if you imagine how they might end up. But as long as there's profit in it, none of our business of what they do to him. And there is profit in this, so there's no problem whatsoever. The world will keep on spinning even without justice."

"I'm honestly gonna say I would be lying if I didn't feel for the kid. But I'm more concerned with the fact that our client lied to us... it don't sit right with me. When I was working my dead end job..." _"For nefarious reason's..." _"... I worked in the resource investigation department of the company. So I know a lot about rare metals and rare earth. He's also correct in what he say's about the Lovelace family. I remember reading paper's about the family structure and whatnot so I can attest to the fact that what's he's saying is correct."

"That's actually pretty impressive, panty mountain douche-bag. Even though you got the smallest of brain's you're actually pretty smart. As a reward i'll give you one of mama's home made cherry pies." She says that in a normal manner but god damn I would be stupid to think she actually meant that... sarcastic bitch...

"Either way, its up to Dutch. I'll go with what he want's to do." She continues.

"I'm pretty confused. They had the kid in their possession, so why didn't they ask for the ransom and get the damned land? Is there really any reason for them to keep it a secret and sell him off?"

"Don't know why they'd keep it a secret. But selling the kid is a pretty simple and clear reason. They were obviously pissed off. Cartel's and Mafia's can't stand it when they get they're face's rubbed with shit. Am I right?"

Dutch then lets up on the accelerator but puts it at a slow speed.

"Revy, is its their face's that are at stake, there is definite trouble ahead. I'm gonna go ahead and put a little insurance on the kid before we deliver him." He say's. Revy chuckles a little bit at that.

"I'm going to call Balalaika to see what's going on here."

He then calls Balalaika on the radio and explains to her that he needs a favor.

"Oh my. It's rare to hear the famous Dutch calling in for a favor." She say's over the radio... thing... I don't know.

"Detail about the Manisarera Cartel and the Lovelace family would be nice. Mind getting that for us?" He say's back.

"Heh heh, nice timing, we've actually just got a job in, concerning the Manisarera."

"Thanks, I owe you one. But since we're still setting up the insurance, would you so terribly mind not stirring things up?" He asks.

"Oh, well that's impossible."

"Excuse me?"

"In business like ours when things get stirred up... they stir up like a typhoon."

"Well... just do the best you can and play it cool."

"Yeah, I hear ya. Do I call you back at your office?"

"No, we'll be having a drink at the Yellow Flag." Revy actually perk's up at this, and I'm not gonna lie... I do too.

"See you then." She's say's

"Good bye." He then hangs up the corded transponder thing. (I honestly do not know what the fuck to call it but could you just roll with it? Please? For me?)

"Well then Rock, we have one more thing to check out."

"What's that?"

"Is Daddy Lovelace the type to spend personal resources to deal with a hostage situation like the kid say's?"

"He would if he had the money but they only have enough for one servant as it is."

"Servant? What kind?"

"Only a house maid." For some reason the back of my mind just jump up from frat party with no restrictions to an actual version of the movie Project X but times 2.

"Ha ha, think a maid's gonna come rushing in for the little prince of a bastard? Oohh that's gon be fun, I can tell."

Again... the back of my mind is screaming at me for some reason... I don't know but I think Revy might be on to something... I'll have to keep an eye out even while drinking.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

At the dock's... finally...

"Hey brat, move it!" Revy half yell's I also hear the follow up of a smack.

I turn around to see Dutch about to say something but I beat him to the punch... HA punch... see what I did there? No?... fuck you too then.

"Hey Revy, lay off the kid will you? You were a little bitch back then too, don't go around smacking little kids for the hell of it. You're an adult now, act like one... for the most part at least."

"What'd you say about me being a little bitch you panty mountain douche-bag!?"

"Um... panty mountain douche-bag? Why do you call him that?"

"Long story short kid, blame alcohol and two almost literal shit stain's to do that to me. I myself had nothing to do with it but Revy apparently thinks I still did even though she saw mountain's of evidence saying it wasn't me." I say to him before Revy could tarnish my good standing.

"What? Who would do that?" Dutch started to sweat a little.

"* heavy sigh* No one kid, lets go. I'm tired and thirsty, lets go before Revy's period time gets any worse."

"Dutch and Benny chuckled at that but walk briskly to the car with the kid before they got I the crossfire.

"Just cause you got a gun now, don't think it will protect you, you panty mountain douche-bag. You're gonna get it." She say's threateningly, pointing at the FN .45 that's holstered on my left side since I like my right hand more than my left even though I can use both pretty well.

Yeah I got my weapon of choice, its modified to the point where I could almost have limitless mods for it but I only went with raised sight's since I ordered an Osprey silencer for it, best silencer in my opinion, can't hear the shot at all whatsoever so the only thing you hear the gun cocking back to load another bullet and leaving the empty bullet case clashing with the ground so all in all its a pretty nice piece.

I paid extra for it to be spray painted black since a tan colored gun isn't really my thing, also I should say that it's a good gun for ambidextrous people. It has the magazine release on both sides, safety on both sides, slide release on both sides, perfect for people like me and I couldn't be happier. With it along with my knife... I am death incarnate oh and I should also mention that I got a modified mag's for it so it has 30 rounds to fire instead of the default 15.

Anyway after that whole discussion, we're on the road towards Yellow Flag while Revy is still going on about how I would be better as a butler than a sailor or some shit and then pulls out this gem. Right out of her ass that is...

"Just like Old Black Joe, surrounded by other servants and having a dandy ol' time."

"We only have one servant, I thought I already told you this. A maid named Roberta. And even though she can't preform the simplest of a maid's duty's like cooking and cleaning. She's a total klutz but... She's a whole lot stronger than you!" Garcia speaks up.

Oh shit... I now know why my mind was screaming at me... I suddenly remember now, you know that one childhood friend I had? Yeah she wasn't made up like how my original back ground was, and granted it wasn't a whole lie. I'll tell you more later but I remember now... shes the one who did all that stuff in the revolution and shit, scary stuff man close to my level if you can believe it and now she's working as a maid for the Lovelace family? What the fuck man? I mean I know she worked as a maid for some reason or another but she just HAD to be the maid of the Lovelace family? I know she's the Blood Hound of Florencia and I know she's dangerous as fuck but I can't tell them I know her... let alone being the childhood friend of hers before she moved... it would raise too many question's so I guess... I'll just have to play it cool.

Revy then cracks up at what he said like it was the funniest thing she's heard all day, scratch that, all her life.

"HA HA HA! Of all the most fucked up things to say! She's not gonna throw a tea pot at me, will she!? HA HA HA!" She laughs even more, poor bitch don't know what she's in for I'll tell you what.

"If that's true, I'll believe Jesus flew on route 66 in a fucking chopper! HAHA!" She continues.

I decide to ask the million dollar question without raising any eye brows.

"Have you seen her strength?" Revy then stops laughing, slightly sulking.

"I haven't, but I remember one thing." He then looked thoughtful for a moment before continuing.

"I didn't have many friend's so Roberta would play with me when she could, we used to arm wrestle for fun and I won every single time. But I remember one day where that apparently changed and made me realize she was letting me win the whole time. We were arm wrestling that day to when... they came." I was skeptical at first when he said he won every single time since... well she's Robert... the Blood Hound, I was actually thinking she lost her touch but I guess she liked Garcia enough to let him win every time.

"They came to threaten my father, again. She knew what was going on, long before I did. She hardened up as soon as she realized they were coming. I tried to beat with my usual strength but she wouldn't budge... it was like her arm was made of steel." He continued.

HA! I knew it! That's the Roberta I slightly know! The only reason I say that is because I haven't seen or talked to her since after she moved, I mean we kept in touch for little bit through mail but that died out after awhile.

"She had a reason to always act like a weak maid. I found out then."

My spider sense was tingling that impending danger was gonna happen soon... ok well not spider sense but you know that little tingle in the back of your head when you think something is about to happen and it does? Yeah that's called your 6th sense and spider man, who was my hero when I was a kid which is cliche as fuck but he really is awesome. Anyway spider man, when bit had these powers but his so called spider sense is just a heightened form of the 6th sense, with me I had is honed during my active duty as a soldier in the military and as the 'Demon of the East'. Both are NOT of the same origin, my life as a soldier and my life as the 'Demon of the East' is totally different just thought I'd point out.

All of this was going on as we finally reached the Yellow Flag, my 6th sense was on fire so I made sure that my holster was unbuttoned before we went in, just in case. Revy opened the door to reveal a group of people laughing at a girl in a maid outfit who I instantly knew.

One of the people in the group started saying something.

"Be rude? This Bitch, can you believe her?! HA HA!"

"She's making me laugh so hard!" Said another one.

"What are you going to do little miss maid?" Said another.

"I'm afraid I will not be able to hold back. Please pardon me. But please enjoy yourselves." Came the monotone voice of Roberta... it's gonna get ugly, I can tell, I'm already inching my way towards a table which I intend to flip over for at least some form of cover.

"Roberta!" I heard Garcia say as Robert starts to slowly raise her umbrella which I'm getting back juju from.

Just then an explosion like shot came from her umbrella. I KNEW IT WAS A FUCKING GUN!

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**Cliff hanger anyone? It will get interesting next chapter I assure you. Did you like it? Did you not like? Please review! It really helps me as a writer when I get feedback from my reader's. Also as shameless self promotion check out the other story I'm writing as a story challenge: Of Scales &amp; Flames, it's a One Piece fanfiction with Luffy/Robin pairing :D I already have great idea's for it and stuff so be sure to check it out if you'd like and with that I say good bye and have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :D**


	6. Chapter 6

*Sigh* You know that feeling you get when something is about to go horribly wrong and decide to take a few moment's to assess the situation as much you can before it horribly and Royally fucks up? Yeah, I sort did just that before we entered the bar and got shot to hell... ok well we didn't get shot and they weren't aiming at us but... damn... there was a bullet that went past my head, I still can't believe I'm alive. Anyway, before we entered the bar I decided to fake take a piss and go around the side and into the alley of the Yellow flag, plant a small device that would explode at the touch of a button on the breaker, oh how happy I am that i did that, you'll see why in a little bit.

Oh and also I KNEW IT WAS A FUCKING GUN I JUST KNEW IT! Ok I'll stop and continue with where we left off at...

After that shot there was only silence, well as much silence as you could get with a squeaky light swinging and a body hitting the middle of a table 20 feet away and breaking it in the process... yeah that dude is dead, no question.

"_Da fuq?" _I intelligently thought as I heard a guitar... I swear I did, hand to god I heard a guitar. Pretty nice tone to it as well.

"Wow, rude. Bao just reopened the bar." Dutch said with a slight scowl. Revy whistled.

"That pretty flashy, wonder who her supplier is." She said.

Poor kid, seeing Robby like that. (Nickname, don't ask and I swear to god she will kill you if you say that to her.)

"This bitch!" Leader man snarled and pulled out his pistol and shakily pointed it at her.

"Boy's!" The unasked command was answered when they all started pulling out their equipment, and I mean gun's people, not the nasty kind of equipment, get your head outta the gutter. Seriously.

"Don't you fucking hold back! Kill her with every last clip!"

"Please do as you must, if you can." She said the last part with an eerie smirk. It almost gave me chills... almost.

"Shut up you bitch!" Leader guy yelled back.

"Roberta!" The kid yelled whispered. (You know what I mean don't you? You know like yelling but whispering at the same time.) The group turns to the kid but I'm still paying attention to Robby.

I still hear that guitar by the way...

As the little group starts to fire at her, she runs to the left along side the bar and does a cartwheel only to drop the suitcase on the floor and opening up her umbrella. Fuck if I know what she's doing but I know she is still alive, she does nothing without thinking as far as I know.

I see that they stopped firing and chuckled a little bit. The umbrella looked beat up but was in rather good shape for taking massive amounts of bullets, must a little bit bullet resistant.

The umbrella start's to roll out of the way before I see those soldier eyes of hers... holy fuck I'm actually starting to get turned on but like hell am I gonna say anything about it... damn...

She then gets up and start's to fire her umbrella shotgun and I had to hold back a laugh when I heard the first guy go down with such a hilarious scream, I'm really trying to hold back my laughter but I slip up and let out a little chuckle, thank god no one noticed.

They start having their little shootout while I'm already under a table with another table flipped over in front of me when suddenly the rest of the group get in with me.

"We've walked into a very bad fight. But the fact that they're fighting each other rather than us is in our favor. How ' bout we take off while they... do what it is they're doing?" Dutch say's.

"Even if we do manage to make it out of here without any new holes in our body, where the hell would we go?" I inquire. Like hell am I leaving this spot until I absolutely have to or know I have a safe chance of getting out of cover and finding a new place to hide- *cough cough* I mean be safe from bullets.

"We could always go fishing at Phuket beach until all of this cools down." The beach is appropriately named too, not exactly the best place to hang out at if you don't want to see people saying ' Fuck it!' and doing some sort of crazy shit that would be harmful for other people or just disgusting to look at. Had the most unfortunate memory of being there for the first time... Revy took me there when she was acting as my tour guide when I first joined... I think she volunteered to take me sight seeing too, now I see why, fucking bitch! Gonna have to get her back... why didn't I see this earlier?

"I'm not really in the mood to have a drink in the middle of a gun fight." Dutch continued.

"Could you hurry up and decide if we need to shoot or not?" Revy asked, I think when she said 'we' I think she included me with her... not gonna lie, I wanna break my pistols cherry and get its first kill.

"Yeah, good call. I rather not shoot." Benny pitched in.

"We'll have the kid here too. I don't exactly want to take a walk while carrying a claymore." Dutch said.

"But he's worth something Dutch." Revy whined.

We all then turned head towards the door when we see both sides of the doorway get shot to hell.

"Oh god dammit, our exit became a warzone while we were talking... god dammit! There's no way out over there." Dutch nearly yelled.

Gunshots were heard and passed over our heads, kid lost it and tried to runaway but Dutch made sure he stayed.

"The kid isn't worth anything anymore. We're leaving him here, ok?" He said.

Poor kid, don't exactly want to leave him here... god damn me and my fucking conscience.

"We don't exactly got a choice. Damn, damn, fuck." Revy sort of chanted while crawling away.

"Alighty then." Dutch was right behind her.

I was right behind Dutch and before I passed the kid I decided to not leave him, I don't car if he isn't worth anything, he's a kid for god sake's! Guess I was taking too long before Dutch called for me.

"Rock, what're you doing?" Dutch had to half yell half whisper to me. Before I could answer I heard Revy shouting at the top of her lungs... fucking idiot bitch...

"They aren't friend's you idiot! I don't know who they are!" As she yelled all the gun fire stopped... fucking great... I guess that device I planted really did come in handy after all!

"Lagoon Company? What are you doing here? What happened to delivering our package?!" The Leader dude screamed form outside.

"Don't jump to conclusion's Gregor!" Dutch yelled. Guess the Leader dudes name is Gregor? Wow, poor guy. (Sucky name if you ask me...)

"What the fuck? Why is the package here? Did you fucking ignore our contract!?" 'Gregor' yelled when he saw Garcia stand up, staring at Roberta.

"I said don't jump to conclusion's. We'll talk about payment later!" Dutch yelled back.

After a few moments of silence Roberta broke it.

"Young Master..." She quietly said.

"Roberta..." If I didn't know any better i would have said this was a cliché romantic scene in some sappy movie... *shudder's* Robert and Garcia? *Jim Carry's voice* 'I think not~!'.

"So you were here, young master. The master has been very worried about you. Please..." At the end she started to move towards the kid but he took two steps back, halting her in the process.

"It cannot be helped that you are afraid. But I will explain myself later." After she was done saying that, she turned towards us... and locked eyes with me... fuck... don't blow it woman!

"Who're they?" Oh thank god... *wipes brow*

"Not good. Their eye's met." Dutch quickly stated. Yeah no shit Sherlock, we're in deep shit now, I'm glad and miffed that she didn't recognize me but whatever, just gotta roll with it I guess.

She started to raise her umbrella gun at us when suddenly the kid got in front of me.

"Wait! Roberta! No!"

Suddenly, Revy had the kid in a choke hold with her gun to his head. Roberta seemed to stop raising her gun for the moment.

"Stand back, _maid_." Revy seethed.

"Everyone here would rather be alive than dead. You too, right?" Revy continued.

"God dammit Revy, don't do that or else _we'll _look like the bad guy's here." I say.

"Shut up." She told me... again... can anyone say BIOTCH?

"As long as you don't start shooting, you'll get to take _young master_ home in one piece. You won't have to see his brains on the floor." She said. Grinding out 'young master'.

"Got it?" She, again, continued.

For a few moments, Robby stayed silent before speaking again.

"I am thinking." The robot like maid said.

"Don't ignore you fucking bastards!" A goon said before running towards Roberta and yelling but ultimately getting shot to bits by her shotgun... not gonna lie here... I'm sorta jealous of her... I want that shotgun but I guess beggar's can't be chooser's. *Sigh*

After another agonizing silent moment, the maid finally started to talk. FIANLLY!

"I have finished thinking." She said. Her answer ain't gon be pretty I just know it...

"Una bendicion por los vivos. Una rama de flor por los muertos. Con una espada por los justica. Una castigo de muerte para los malvados. Asi llegamos en el altar de los santos." She said in spanish. (I really do hope you fuckers appreciate the amount of time it took me to translate all that -_-)

"Sin embargo no nos sumamos la línea de los santos." I say, interrupting what the kid was going to say, ah well I've been interrupted enough I might as well do it to other people, besides I haven't talked a foreign language in a long time. It feel's good to speak in a different tongue, sorta refreshing, if that makes any sense.

"It all translates into this: A blessing for the living. A branch of flowers for the dead. With a sword by Justice. A punishment of death for the wicked. So we arrived at the altar of the saints. However we are not joining the line of saints. The Lovelace family creed, am I correct?" I ask her.

"... Yes. Although not very many people know it, I should ask as to why you know such a thing."

I smirk a little and decide to give my spanish a try out.

"Robby soy yo Ken. Ya sabes, el chico tú siempre jugaste con espalda en Japón antes de que te fuiste, voy a explicar todo lo que más tarde pero tienes mi garantía de que el niño estará a salvo." It's tiny, but I could see her eyes widen behind her glasses a bit when I said that, the kid looked at me confused. Lets hope he doesn't say anything.

(It translates into: "Robby It's me Ken. You know, the guy you always played with back in Japan before you left, I'll explain everything later, but you have my guarantee that the child will be safe." I had to use two translators at the same time so I got it as accurate as I could so if any spanish people reading this... sorry if I accidentally butchered your language, free guac at your local mexican restaurant ok?... racist I know but come on who doesn't love the guac eh? Insane people, that's who... wait a minute... why do I like it then? Am I actually sane? Dear god I hope not... being sane is too boring in my professional opinion...)

"Actuar como si no me conoces por el momento. A la medianoche, mi encuentro fuera de mi apartamento. Dejaré una nota eso da la dirección antes de irme. Ten cuidado vale?" I continue.

(Translates into: "Act like you do not know me yet. At midnight, meet me outside my apartment. I will leave a note that gives the address before leaving. Be careful okay?")

She gives a hesitant nod before continuing with what she was doing before, have to give the girl credit... she seemed pretty cool with just finding out her childhood friend came out no where...

"I will have the young master home in one piece. However, I must work by this creed. In the name of Santa Maria. A hammer blow to all injustice!" She says. She started to spin around to bring her suitcase in front of her. Maybe she playing it too cool? I'm not exactly liking the fact she's gonna do what I think she's gonna do towards her friend... oh well guess that's the ways shes trained but still, even I have heart... at times.

Just when she was firing at Revy, who by the way was also shooting right back, I heard and saw the telltale sign of an explosion... with Revy in it... shit man...

"Shit... Revy!" Dutch yelled, running towards the bar.

I suddenly pushed the button to the device and heard the telltale sign of something blowing up which in turn, destroyed the breaker, bursting the lights in the process. It blew up but it wasn't like it was C4 or anything, just a small EMP device I always keep on me for situations like this... thank god I was carrying it...

With everything in the dark, everybody started shooting in the dark, well for a moment before the back up generator kicked in with its own source of light... clever bastard of a bartender thought of everything.

I overheard Benny say to Dutch that Revy was ok but had a concussion.

Me? What am I doing? Standing as calmly as a motherfucker, that's what I'm doing... the kid on the other hand... ain't taken it well that his maid is a killer... a good one in fact.

"Please stop, Roberta! Stop!" Garcia choked out.

"Kid..." I look at him with sympathy... I don't know what its like to find out that your maid is a killer but I do fell sorry for him...

"Rock! Stop fucking around! We're leaving!" Dutch yelled.

Before I could say or do anything, the kid grabbed my wrist. Kid has a grip, I'll give him that much.

"Please take me with you..." He quietly said. Roberta must really be a dog since she has to have super hearing to hear him say that over gunfire and with him nearly whispering it... I nearly had to lean in to listen to him... damn...

"Young Master!"

"I... I don't... I don't like this Roberta!"

"*Sigh* Go on with the rest of the gang, I'll be out shortly." I tell him.

"Rock, what're you doing?!" Dutch yelled.

"Keep the kid safe til I get back, i'll be fine, just go! Wait for me by the car!" I yell back.

He reluctantly nods, Benny grabs the kid and puts him on his back. They then run outside through the back.

I pull out my cigarettes from my shirt pocket, its time for a smoke I tell you what. I light it up and take a big puff, eye's all on me... for some reason I feel self conscious...

"Yes? May I help you?" I ask everyone.

"If you don't give back Young Master, I will be forced to kill you." She says.

"Like I said, you have my guarantee that he'll be safe, I like the kid so any harm that comes to him does harm to me..." I puff again before throwing it on the ground, squashing it beneath my feet. I then make my way over to the bar, grabbing a random bottle.

"O-oi! You gotta pay for that!" Bao yell's. Nearly forgot the poor bastard.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll pay you back next time we're here. Mind putting it on my tab?" I say before taking a huge swig of whatever I picked up... it tasted ok but it was nothing like a good bottle of bacardi.

"You fuckers done yet?!" Leader boy Gregor yelled asked.

"You don't exactly need my permission to keep shooting... do you? Last time I checked I don't even know you..." I ask him with a tilted head... the guy sure is stupid.

"Oh yeah..." He FINALLY decides to shoot at us, I run behind the pillar that was opposite of Roberta's, taking my awesome new pistol out before firing a few rounds...

"_I think I nicked a guy in the shoulder, not sure... should have hit him in the head, maybe the aim is off? Gonna have to get the fixed. Shooting slightly to the right it is!"_ I thought to myself.

"Why are you helping me?" Roberta asks. She shoots off another burst before looking at me.

"Well _sorry _for helping you. I know you don't need the help, I just thought this would be a perfect time to break my pistols cherry!" I yell over the returning fire, I should probably start getting my knife ready, only had two clips on me which sucks...

I empty the rest of my first clip into some idiot who thought it would be a good idea to run up to me while screaming 'Die!'... I admit I have seen my fair share of idiots but... this here is a new breed of stupid... lets hope the next generation comes out ok. Even though the yolo/swag shit has passed it still puts my on the fence on whether I should be hopeful or not, cause since yolo/swag has died out... is something else fucking stupid gonna come out?...oh well, that's a debate for another time.

I fire around 10 shots, clipping a guy hand, making him drop his gun, another guy got hit in the heart and another got a very shiny bullet to the left eye. I decide around this time to bring out my family's pride a joy... unfortunately its not me or my sibling's... its a knife... my family's pride and joy is a knife... can't blame'em though, pretty epic knife. (If you haven't already, check out my profile for the link to the site in which it shows Rock's knife, granted I didn't make it but you have to admit, pretty epic knife. Looks like a family heirloom too. Oh and there's also the link to a pic of Rock's Tac .45 and silencer, never thought I would see the exact two things I was looking for in one pic... HOW AWESOME IS THAT YEAH?)

Anyway, I bring the knife out and try to find a way to get to the other side so I can start slashing like the hash slinging slasher... I like spongebob so what? Got a problem with yellow sponge's living under the sea in a fucking pineapple? No? Good...

Before I could make a move, Roberta ran out of ammo, finally, and was in a pickle where Leader dude Gregor had a pistol aimed straight at her... along with the rest of the survivor... excuse me. I mean soon-to-be-dead people yeah, that's more like it.

"Got you now bitch. When I bring your head back, I'll be god damned promoted to lieutenant! So be a good little maid and die already!" He yelled.

"I no longer have a reason for you to live." She stated simply. By the way... I'M RIGHT HERE YOU KNOW! How could ANYONE in a gunfight NOT remember that there are TWO, I repeat TWO people killing them, really I mean I thought that other guy was an idiot but this is just a whole collective of idiots... I feel pity for them, I really do. I wonder how many times they were dropped on their heads as a kid, poor, poor baby head's falling onto the hard surface of the floor...

I capitalize like a ruthless American Businessman and seize that one moment of surprise to fire off my remaining clip into two guy's before I fling out my knife and started running straight at them.

I'm going to make sure Leader boy is still alive after this for Roberta to rough up. Of course that's unless she starts killing him now... I don't really have a problem with it but whatever.

The group that was talking amongst themselves recoiled in shock when the two men I shot, finally hit the ground. To get a good image of their line up is this: The Leader shit is in the front with two guy's on either side of him while another two were just behind the first two, I dropped the ones furthest back first before, again, running at them.

I toss my knife to the left guy in the back saying a hearty 'Catch!' while running towards the other one. Just as he was about to turn, I kick the side of his knee with an audible crunch, I elbow his jaw, fracturing it. When he's finally on both knee's, excuse me I mean his one good knee, I executed him with a somewhat merciful neck snap.

I then noticed Leader queer had turned around fully, pointing his gun in my face. He also forgot Roberta. Idiots I tell you, idiots.

Before I could break his wrist, Robert already had him in a choke hold with her right hand secured on the mans gun hand, his right if you needed to know.

"I do not appreciate people kidnapping young master. You shall repay your crimes in full. Adiós, pido disculpas por mi mala educación." She then snapped his neck in the same I had with the other guy, although she snapped it in such a way that it made a more audible crunch than my guy... fucking show off. (She said in spanish: I apologize for my rudeness.)

I get up fully off the last guy I killed before clapping with another 'Not bad' face.

"As much as I would like to stay here and catch up, I have a group of people waiting for me by the car. It's good to see you again Robby." I flash her my infamous womanizing smile. Ok fine, I just did a regular smile and there's nothing 'womanizing' about it. Get off my back already... if you're a woman then stay there as much as you like.

"..."

"Ok then... I guess I'll leave, for now anyway. Oh right! Almost forgot." I Then search around for a pen and some paper, said I would leave the address right?

"Oooh, lucky!" I spot a pencil and a small notebook protruding from one of the dead guy's, it has some blood on it but that don't matter none. I write the address down and tear off the piece of paper and give it to her.

"I will come here at the time you've given me." She said in monotone.

"You know, you don't have to be all robot like. I'm like you, maybe two or three time's more so and I'm still me. Don't let what you did affect you. You're sorry for doing what you did, I get that, I really do. More so than you may think. Anyway, before I start going on about my life story up to this point, I got to go and you need to chase us. For now at least, can't have them raise any eye brows. OH! Punch me in the face!" I think I confused her if her head tilt said anything, which it didn't... its a metaphor if you haven't already guessed.

I make my way to the guy with my knife in his back and yank it out, drying it on his shirt and re-holstering it just as Roberta was going to talk.

"Why?" She said with narrowed eyes.

"Would cause too much suspicion if I went back unscathed." I said simply.

"Why would I need to punch you when you are already hurt?" …...Waitwut?

"Huh?" I said intelligently.

"You're shot, I thought you knew that." She then pointed to my leg, which in fact, had a hole, bleeding.

"Oh well looky there... guess I am. *Sniff* Should probably leave and get that checked out." I'm trying not to freak out, not a big fan of being shot. I don't think anyone likes to be shot really... unless you're into that sort of stuff.

"That would most likely be an ideal plan. I shall clean up here." Just as I was about to leave she put a hand on my shoulder.

"It's nice to see you too Ken, I will see you soon I hope." I gave a nod to her before making my way to the front door exit, I then head to the left side of the block and thats where the car was running and Dutch looking at me like he saw a ghost... never knew a black person could be that white... huh...

I get into the back seat of the car with Benny immediately steeping on the gas just as the whole entire building of the Yellow Flag blew up... yup she cleans up alright.

"What the hell was that Rock?!" Dutch asked me.

"I was breaking my pistols cherry, no need to get all hyper."

"You were helping that insane maid! What the hell were you thinking?!"

Just as I was about to answer, my adrenaline wore off and now i'm starting to feel the pain in my leg... which hurts like a bitch.

"OH HOLY FUCK!" I suddenly yelled, startling everyone inside the car, 'cept Revy, cause she's knocked out.

"What?! What is it!?" Benny asked.

"Rock's been shot! We need to get to a doctor fast!" Dutch said.

"I'm fine, just a leg shot. Just need to get the bullet out and tie up the wound and I'll be ok in a few day's. Besides I don't think that killer robot maid from the future is gonna give us time to go see a doctor." I say, pointing to Dutch's side view window.

(At this point, just go along with what happened in the episode since I'm too lazy to write it out and also there's not really much I want to change until near the end. So with that, I'm time skipping to where Revy and Roberta are done fighting and are now on the ground, aiming at each other with their pistols.)

"Ha! Mexican stand off, lying down style." I say, chuckling.

"I don't think this is the time to crack jokes Rock." Dutch says from inside the car.

"Nah, its all fine, they won't kill each other." I say back. I bring out my cigarettes and light one up.

"How do you know that they won't?" Benny said, again, from inside the car.

I say nothing and look on. I notice movement in the shadows but before I could do anything about it, the lights turn on, blinding everyone for a few moments.

"_The hell? Is it an enemy?" _I reach for my pistol but stop once I hear Balalaika's voice.

"Don't move!" She yell's. After a few moment's of silence, she spoke again.

"Why don't you two call it quits there. There's no profit in fighting anymore. Don't waste your energy, Two-Hands." She says.

"Shut up. I'm going to kill this four eyed bitch." She quietly replies.

All that Roberta did was give a hearty 'Hmph.'

"Let me tell you something good, Miss Maid." Balalaika said.

During this time, I took a better look at who is surrounding us.

"_Ex-military is the uniforms are anything to go by. The tactic's they are using are similar... we're not dealing with regular mafia bro's or regular military... this is Balalaika's personal platoon. I don't think she'll give the order to kill us but I don't really like all these guns pointed at me... god dammit I knew I should have brought more clips with me, fucking can't look epic with a utility belt on me... gonna have to get a new outfit to better suit my expertise."_

"We, Hotel Moscow, had intended to start a war with the Manisarera Cartel from the beginning. Taking care of Gregor was my job but..." She gave me a sideways glance... I don't like that one bit. "... Seems you saved me the trouble if the bodies inside the Yellow Flag are anything to go by."

"Right now, their headquarters in Venezuela should be in ruins. So with that said, there's no problem on any front. Garcia being kidnapped is also no problem. There's no reason to fight." She continued.

"The three most dangerous women in the world, standing right there." I heard Benny say.

"This feels like Ground Zero." Dutch replied. For some reason I wanted to be the little black kid in that one clip and say either 'That Racist!' or 'That's sexist!' so I just went ahead and said nothing...

"That don't matter." I heard Revy say.

"Indeed." Roberta replied.

I think it's finally my time to make my appearance. I slightly limp over to where they're at, nearly all eyes on me... I could _feel_ those guns pointed at me, almost BEGGING me to do something.

"I think it would be best to stop girl's, for your own health that is. Besides, Roberta, I don't think the kid would take too kindly to you being shot in front of him, no matter what people say about you, you're human."

"Stay out of this Rock." Revy seethed.

"I think you should listen to Rock, Two-Hands. I'm sure he also wouldn't take it too lightly if I had to kill both of his friends." My head shot towards Balalaika, silently asking her what the hell she was doing.

"Both of his friends? You know glasses bitch Rock?!" Revy stopped her death stare match with Roberta and locked eyes with me.

"Well he should know her. She's his childhood friend after all and visa versa." I heard Balalaika say, her tone laced with amusement. Yeah she made it on the 'People I want to kill before I die' list, DAMMIT SOFIYA.

"You are treading on a dangerous mine field, _Sofiya_. I would like it if you would keep your mouth shut." I ground out.

"Don't talk that way to me _boy_. And what did I always say about you saying that to me?" Balalaika had her eyes narrowed, glaring a hole into my head.

"Even though I got my leg shot I can still match up to you, old hag." I seethed right back.

"I would prefer if we fought on even ground, I'm not heartless enough to kick you while your down." She crossed her arm's.

"Will someone explain to me what the hell is going on here?!" Revy exclaimed, getting up and facing me.

"Oh he knows me personally." Balalaika said with a smug grin.

"Dont'cha, Ken Naito, appropriately named, 'Demon of the East." She continued.

"You bitch! You were not supposed to say ANYTHING whatsoever unless I said it was ok... as you can see, IT WAS NOT OK!" I yell. Bitch just revealed my name AND title... what the hell man? It took a long time to get rid of me and make a new person and now she tells nearly everyone I know, which by the way isn't much of but still...

"Rock? Or should I say Ken? Is any of this true?" Dutch and Benny, who during this conversation, made their way to us. Oh and I should also mention that Roberta was standing right beside me, my right if you want specifics.

"*Heavy Sigh* Yes, it is... I was gonna tell you guys soon but _Sofiya_ just HAD to give it all away for shits and giggles, didn't you?" I aim my anger towards her.

She giggled slightly at that... *grumble grumble grumble gonna kill her, smug bitch. Grumble grumble grumble*

"Rock? The infamous 'Demon of the East'? The one who has killed literal thousands, including a few minor and major villages? That 'Demon of the East'? Rock is him? Pfft yeah right!" Revy then laughed... like hard... hold your stomach hard. After a few minutes she finally realized that no one was laughing with her.

"Oh you're serious..." She said wide eyed.

"Yes, yes we are serious. You astound me with your 'Not picking up on the atmosphere' ability." I say.

"I only got one question for you Ro- I mean Ken." Dutch said.

"Yeah?"

"Are you our enemy in any sort of way?" He said seriously.

"Nope. I actually was on a job when I first got here, you weren't part of the plan on me getting captured but I did plan on meeting you afterward anyway so I guess that was a win-win situation." I say with a smile.

"You planned on meeting us anyway? Why?"

"To join you." I stated simply.

"Why would the famed 'Demon of the East' join a delivery company that really shouldn't be on his radar?"

"Meh, I have heard of you and I was sorta getting bored with the whole 'Go kill this guy for this amount of money' or 'Go kill this village for this amount of money' or, this one is my personal favorite, 'Go kill since you owe me a favor' or some shit like that. HA! I don't take contracts for free, no matter how much I owe you."

"But why us? Isn't there other things to do and other people to join instead of us?" Benny asked.

"Yeah, but I didn't really have my heart set on it yet so while I was on my job here and you guys 'captured' me..." I do the little air parenthesis. "... I sorta just went 'Ah what hell, might as well go and have some fun. If they aren't what I expected then Sayónara!'. I have to hand it to you guy's though, you exceeded my expectation's." I say with a smile, which turned into a cringe when I remembered I was recently shot and still haven't had the bullet out yet.

"Before I rush off to find a medic or something I just wanna say, you guy's took me being the 'Demon of the East' pretty well despite my reputation. What gives?" I say while I lower my self to the ground and hold onto the bullet wound.

They all actually shrug at that.

"Guess we've seen our fair share of weird shit and decided since this is the highest we can go on the 'Bullshit we've seen' list, I guess there's not really much else to expect. Welcome to Lagoon Company, Ken Naito." Dutch said, expending his arm. Dammit man, this is actually making me tear up... Dutch hasn't ever let me shake his hand, not that I offered mine but still... *Sniff*

I give him my forearm and he pulls me up and shakes it.

"Let's get you to a doctor." Roberta said, getting my right arm over her shoulder. I smile slightly to her, she gave me one to although on a smaller scale.

"Hey Ken!" Garcia suddenly walked up in front of me before I could be dragged off.

"Yeah kid?"

"Is the 'Demon of the East' like a hero or something? IS he a bad guy?" He asked... innocently although, since he recently found out his maid was a killer I guess he's sort of prepared.

"HA! Kid I have been waiting for someone to say that for year's. Thank you so much for saying that. Here." I reach into my left pocket and bring out my Ipod with headphones. I go to my song list and find what I was searching for. I then give it to Garcia.

"Listen to this and you'll get your answer." I said with a smile, which again, turn into a cringe. (The song is This ain't no place for no hero)

"Hey, while he listen's to that, mind if we find someone to get this damn bullet out already? I don't exactly like having a reminder that I'm still mortal and suddenly remember why it sucks to be shot!"

"I have a medic team on standby near here. I'll take you to them." Balalaika said.

"Hey wait a minute!" Revy suddenly yelled.

"What, dammit? I already revealed nearly everything and now I need a medic. What more could you possibly want?!" I slightly yell.

"Me and glasses bitch ain't done yet!" She said angrily, pointing at said woman.

"Oh my fucking god! Fine! Get on with your stupid duel! Balalaika, would you mind getting the team over here instead?" I say heatedly.

"Yeah, yeah, sure thing kid." I gave her a nod of thanks before she left.

"So you guy's don't kill each other, don't use any sort of weapon. Hate to see my old friend and new one get killed." Revy and Roberta reluctantly agree before Roberta slowly set me down, joining Revy in the middle of the little make shift arena.

"Alright, bring it on!"

"Your shoelace is untied." Roberta said.

"Ha!" Revy still smiled that same smug grin before finally relenting and looking down only to meet Roberta's fist.

After a few minutes of minutes of watching the fight while healing I finally talk.

"I don't think those two like each other. I don't think they ever will like each other..." I absentmindedly say.

"Who do you bet on?" Balalaika asked us.

"Ha! Have to be real stupid to think those two will ever consider not fighting one another. With that said I bet two on Revy." Dutch said.

"Then I'll bet three on Roberta. Who do you bet on Roc- I mean Ken?" Benny asked.

"No one. It will be a draw." I said simply, taking a puff from my cigarette.

"'How do you figure?" Dutch inquired.

All I do is chuckle and continue watching the fight, which I bet 5 on lasting for quite a few hours. I was right about that as well but unfortunately it wasn't a real bet so I didn't make any money... dammit.

"There. Draw. Ken was right, dammit." Balalaika said.

"Roberta!" Garcia ran over to his maid, putting her head into his lap... I swear to god I'm going to shoot my brain for the strange thoughts about their future, which hopefully won't happen.

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**Whew, another chapter done. *wipes brow* sorry for the delay, had the grandparents over for a few days so I couldn't write much, only got one chapter in for Of Scales &amp; Flames and that's about it. I do hope this will satisfy you for awhile :D I liked writing this chapter :D although I think the combat could use some work when I finally do put it in... oh yeah it's gonna happen more often nao :D anyway I hope you guy's liked this chapter and always remember to leave a review and comment on what you think of this story so far and how you think it should improve, IF it should be improved anyway :P can't have people throwing idea's left and right only to deviate the story into something I wasn't planning on writing XD**

**Anyway I do hope you awesome reader's have a gooa morning/afternoon/evening :D *Thumb's up***


	7. Chapter 7

**So, I heard you guys talking shit. You mad I haven't updated in a long time bro's? *Troll face* lol jk but in all seriousness I have been busy but there were times where I was free but didn't have the feeling to write but NOW I DO :D :D :D so now all you fuckers can be happy now and suckle on this chapter like a good little baby while I go put another Chapter in the microwave JUST FOR YOU :D :D... -_-'... ANYWAY I hope you guys enjoy this chapter since this is mostly me just copying episode 11 with tweaks like with Rock being Ken who is a badass and everything... you know, not too many changes ... **

***Disclaimer* I am the creator of Black Lagoon and thought it would be awesome to make a fanfiction out of my own anime and make the pencil pusher japanese guy a total badass and insane man... to those of you who thought that last sentence was true is an idiot . but as a fan of Black Lagoon I took it upon myself to make Rock totally awesome :D with a little bit more backstory to him as well :D ON WITH THE STORY**

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So, I heard from Dutch that we got a job and guess what... I'M THE ONE WHO HAS TO WAKE UP THE BITCH... yay...

I open the door to her room, my nose was instantly assaulted by the smell of alcohol and cigarettes, not that I minded but damn was it powerful in here.

"Yo, Revy. You awake yet?" I asked, knocking on her door as I did so.

"_I probably should have brought sunglasses with me..."_ Of COURSE Revy had to be clad in only her panties and tank top. Oh yeah cause the guy that lives with you would TOTALLY not get an intsta boner and having dark fantasies of doing you right there... yeah totally...

She doesn't answer of course since she's still sleeping and has her headphones in... wait HER headphones? OH...OH... THAT BITCH DID NOT JUST STEAL MY IPOD IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT... NO... THIS BITCH GON GET IT!

With a tick mark growing steadily on my forehead... which is weird considering this is real life but i'm full blooded japanese so *shrugs* fuck if I know.

I walk up next to her bed with an evil thought...

"Revy! Wakey wakey sunshine!" I yell, not right next to her ear since I already did that last time and nearly got a bullet to the shoulder... I'll have to thank my family for those satanic training session we had... saved my life.

"Huh, whowah?!" She sits up right in an instant, looking around for the fire she thought was happening and I'm just over here laughing my ass off.

"Ken? That you? The fuck man, you know how early it is?" She asks finally realizing what it was that woke her.

"Oh and I'm making this iPod mine now just for that... ass hole." She says in an aggravated tone.

I instantly stop laughing at that... OH THIS BITCH GON DIE I SWEAR IT!

"You do and I'm making you another hole a guy could fuck..." I said threateningly... oh yeah... shes in deeeeeeeeeeep shit naw.

"Ugh, fine. Here, I don't like the color anyway." She hands me my iPod lazily. That was a wise choice... ok she's out of the deep shit. All's good.

"Now why'd you wake me you fuckwaffle?" She yawns while rubbing her eyes.

Never mind...

I sit my perfect ass down on the side of her bed, handing her morning cig.

"Dutch has a job for us and says its an emergency."

"A job?..." I light her cig up. "...From who?"

"Mr. Chinese triad dude glasses guy." I say seriously.

"Who the fuck is that?"

"Mr. Chang." I deadpan.

"Ah... kay." She finally sits up right and faces me, rubbing the back of her head... with the light that shines on her from the window she really does look like the deadliest goddess you'll ever meet and by god I want to fuck right now... but that would raise questions like, 'Are you fucking trying to rape me you son of a fuckbiscut?!' And 'The fuck is wrong with you?!' and all that... so I think i'll stray away from that route... for now...

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At the Black Lagoon's HQ...

"Fucking finally. Been waiting here for awhile now. Don't you even offer a cup of coffee? I thought this was a delivery service. What happened Dutch?" Mr. Son of an arrogant prick said.

"We're a delivery company, not a fucking Café." I spoke up. Dutch shoots me a look but I ignore it.

"Didn't you see that fucking torpedo boat? You know why we have that don't ya?" I continue.

"Oooh, that's cold. Mr. uh..." He smiles at me slightly. I smile back and offer up my hand to him, he takes it with a firm grip.

"Ken Naito." His cigarette drops from his mouth to the floor at that, gulps too.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard what I said Mr. Chang." I release his hand and go back over to the coffee machine since I haven't my morning cup yet.

"THE Ken Naito?!" He says standing up.

"The one an only." I say back, putting cream and sugar into the reincarnation of perfection.

"Dutch I heard you got a new guy but this is insane! You got THE Ken Naito, famed Demon o the East working for you?! How?!" He yelled.

"We only just figured out who he was a few nights ago." Dutch say's, shooting another glance at me.

"I basically didn't tell them so Balalaika went up and opened her glory hole for a mouth up and told them. I still have yet to exact my revenge... the bitch." I say with a slight frown.

"By the way. How the hell do you know my name?" I ask, glaring at the chinese man.

"All records of me have been destroyed. How in the nine hells did you know that I am Ken Naito?!"

"Ehehe, well... its kind of a long story but the short version is that you got mega drunk and started doing weird shit and when one of the lower guys of our... organization... asked you what your name was, you said Ken Naito and then said that you were the infamous 'Demon of the East'. He didn't believe you at the time but when he started talking to his friends and their friends, the higher ups heard about it and flipped their shit and exclusively told anyone who said who the 'Demon of the East' was to any of your enemies, they will be killed immediately. They didn't exactly want to be on your bad side..."

"Ugh, I knew when I got drunk it was gonna come back and bite me in the ass..." I, of course, face palm. "... Alright whatever... all is well. They were right that they would be on my bad side if they said anything to anyone so imma let this slide for now. If I catch wind that someone was talking... you and your organization is done for good." I then proceed to do my glare which make civilians pass out from fear... ok not really but sometimes they do piss themselves but whatever.

"I... WE understand. You have nothing to worry about."

"If we're all done chit chatting, lets get down to all the cereal (strange way of saying Serious) stuff. We heard you got hit." I said.

Mr. Chang sat back down with a sigh and took out a new cig.

"Yeah, half of our shit is gone, we got hit hard."

"The Russians?" Dutch asks.

"Nah. We're on good terms with them and I just talked to Miss Balalaika a few days ago." He said waving his hand dismissively.

Suddenly the door open's.

"Ah hey, Two-Hands." He called out, waving.

"'Bout time you got out of the bathroom. Someone secretly feed you laxatives?" I say, chuckling.

"Oh shut the fuck up Ken. Did I miss anything yet?"

"Nope. We were just about to start." Mr. Chang said, pulling out a briefcase and putting it on the table.

"This here is the cause of everything. BUT it just goes to show how much it was worth it."

"I took this beauty from some retard Bulgarian trying to make a quick buck in my territory. Last I can remember, the only person I gave permission to sell guns is Yolanda from the Church of Violence."

"Oh, you mean rip off church? Yeah, ok never-mind, I know that place. Continue." I say.

"Anyway, these guys misunderstood. They were putting up guns for sale like they were hot shrimps from a stall. He misunderstood my warnings as a crazy joke. He finally got the right idea and made a deal when it was time to crush his balls like nuts."

Revy starts giggling like a little school girl and Benny was just smirking, couldn't get a read on Dutch since I was behind him like the duet over here, these guy's have obviously never heard of my torture methods. Hell I made my interrogator instructor puke one time... well numerous times really. I was sick back then... oh wait I STILL AM AHAHAHAHA

"What an idiot. But as it turned out, he had an interesting job. He worked on intelligence for Bulgaria, Dutch. This city is a comfortable place for folks like that too. Normally a guy like that is useful, but... playing with fire like that cost him. For the sake of his balls he gave us this... Papers."

"Ooohhh, shits about to go down." I say quietly.

"The hiking charts for a certain amusing little group. The job they had before was on the TV all damn morning."

"Oh shit, right I remember hearing that the US embassy was hit." I say.

"That's a dangerous one..." Dutch said quietly.

"Ball's-boy, in all actuality, was working for them. So many people want to see Uncle Sam to disappear. I told one of the groups that they dropped something. But before they heard what it would cost them they said 'Get your ass's out of here before its turns into roast.' So I go ahead and say I'll leave. Next thing I know, my offices are hit all the way to Jordan. And what do y'know, my ass is nearly roast before I got here. These new groups are no fun at all anymore. So, Dutch, this is the deal. I want you to deliver this."

"Yeah, like what else are we going to do." I rolled my eyes.

"Where are we going to deliver it to and when." I continued.

"Five teams will leave Roanapur at the same time, with different destinations. There are five cases but only one Bingo. As insurance, of course. You goal is the Filipino base on Basilan island, time limit is two days. Then my CIA contacts will leave Basilan."

"Two days is too soon, Chang." Dutch say's.

"It's always too soon. This morning's embassy bombing was only the beginning. In two days the next schedule starts." While he kept talking I hear cars doors slam, normally I wouldn't pay attention to it but it sounded like there were a lot of them, so I make my way over to the window and look through the blinds.

"Yo, guy's." ….. They keep talking.

"Guy's." …... They keep talking.

"GUY'S!"

"What!?" They say in near unison.

"We got company... AAAAANNDD now they're gonna RPG the shit out of this place so I suggest running like a little bitch... NOW!" I say, going into a full sprint over the table and behind the couch.

KABOOM!... Is the closest thing I could think of to describe that explosion but whatever, cliché kabooms aside, its time to kill some fuckers. THIS TIME I'M READY BITCH'S!

Oh yeah I guess I forgot to tell you I got my old outfit back, fucking rocking it with a backwards black baseball cap with shades neatly tucked on top of it (The glasses by the way are attached by a string around the neck so they didn't fly off when he jumped the couch) I have a black T-shirt on with a heart being cracked down the middle with a tear drop shaped droplet of blood on the bottom of it on the front of the shirt. A bullet proof vest which is custom built to actually live up to the name 'Bullet proof' unlike regular vest's which usually only protect against 9mm pretty good but rarely anything above it. I alsot made itself at home underneath my shirt. I have a utility belt with the left side slightly more down that the other, stocked up with .45 mags cause I love my pistol... it my widdle baby and it needs it ammo to kill people.

I also have baggy military pants with extra pockets for extra ammo and gadgets, the pants are, by the way, tucked into my steel tipped military boots. (I love military gear if you hadn't noticed already) I also nearly forgot to mention I have a kickass black scarf with white diamonds all around it, around my neck and tucked under my vest, its loose enough to cover my mouth and tight around the neck enough that it wouldn't flop everywhere. To top off my kick ass outfit, I have this epic as Revy's ass black leather trench coat with a very creepy skull on the back of it with a bullet entering the right temple and exiting the left with blood splatter going in that direction (The skull is obviously looking at whoever is behind Ken). No practical use but I love the way it looks and feels... I feel complete with it on honestly.

My knife holster in nestled at the my lower back and my pistol holster is on the left of me so when I whip it out (…...shut up you pervs) I use my right hand since you know... I'm right handed.

"Ugh... I gotta remember to jump behind couch's without tripping over a cushion, that way I won't have a bump on my forehead every damn time." I mutter to myself, getting up and dusting myself off.

"My oh my, they're here early." Mr. 'I don't like this fucker' said, looking at his now crushed cig.

"Boss, you safe?!" One of his bodyguards asks.

"You're information's off Chang. This job is canceled." Dutch say's, rearranging his sunglasses... does this guy know when to stop being a douche bag and actually take off those damn glasses? I mean really we've went on night jobs and the fucker still wear's them... ugh whatever.

"Are you quitting already? If so, you're have to pay the repair bill for this. I'll at least escort you to the boat. But..." He looks at his bodyguard and he proceeds to give him two pistols. "...I haven't been out in the field in awhile. Where's your emergency exit?"

"I'll lead the way!" Revy proclaims, looking very happy like she hasn't killed in forever... she killed a guy at the yellow flag for touching her butt just yesterday. I mean I would have gladly 'interrogated' the fucker for quite a while but I wasn't the one who had my butt touched so I didn't know he did till' I heard an emptying of a Cutlass's clip... poor guys face was had so many new holes... damn...

"Sorry to disappoint ya guy's but I'm doing this alone. No one here leave's alive." I say, lighting a cig and putting my iPod headphones on.

"Excuse me?!" Revy yelled.

"I said I'm doing this alone, I haven't had a good blood bath since I got here. Now stay out of my way or I will shoot your leg. I mean that to all of you as well." I say threateningly.

"Stay here and get to see Ken Naito work? Yeah I can live with that!" Mr. 'Fan' said with a huge ass grin.

I hear 'silent' footsteps outside the door, I get my pistol out and since I know there's already a bullet in the chamber, I'm not going to cock it like in the movies... I swear they need to get their facts as straight as me cause ain't no way Terminator cocked that shotgun without losing a very good shell.

I get my iPod out and select my 'For when I'm killing' playlist and press play. (First song that plays is 'Last man standing' by hammerfall)

Just as soon as I press play I open the door to the surprised terrorists.

"(I!) I AM THE ONE! (THE ONE!) WHO LOST CONTROL! (CONTROL!) BUT IN THE END I'D BE THE LAST MAN STANDING! (I!) I AM THE ONE! (THE ONE!) WHO SOLD HIS SOUL! (HIS SOUL!) FOR EVER GONE TO BE THE LAST MAN STANDING TAAAALLLL!" I then close the door... hahaha that probably confused the fuck out of them.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Revy yelled.

"Shh..." I shh'd quietly. I also silently snicker, WHO WOULDN'T AHAHAHAHA

Just as they were about to get out of their daze, I pull out my silenced pistol, going back out and shooting the guy's on the left first, one had a grenade pulled already so when I shot him... he let it loose and BOOM instant kill streak. Of course he was right next to the door to I closed it before it went off.

I then open the damaged door again and looked to my front and see a guy with a panicked look on his face... he was dead thank god or else I would have been shot, not that I would have let that happen with my F.E.A.R like reflex's hehehe.

So when I see the dead guys in the front I see bodies moving to my right, they are down with bloody faces and everything so they can't really do anything except writhe in pain. I walk out calmly and put mercy bullets into their skull's.

"Yo, guy's..." I call out. "... Wait one minute before you come out and just follow the bodies, should be safe by then!"

"Kill hog!" Revy yelled.

"Damn straight!" I yell back, listening to the next song that played. ('Blood on my hands' by The Used)

I walk to the right since that's where the emergency exit is. I see two guys camping a corner with one trying to fire at me but, as always, missing. I see the other guy throw a grenade but I just calmly kick it like a soccer ball right back at them.

"_This is getting too easy." _I thought to myself, reloading my pistol.

I make my way further down the hallway where I shoot another two guy's right in front of me and then suddenly aim at the guy's coming up the stair way to my right. I kill all three of them with ease and as soon as i'm done with that my spidey sense goes off and I aimbot the guy above me, then another guy to the left of the other guy who thought he got a shot at me.

While I reload again I begin to think my pistol isn't going to be enough so I pick up a dead guy's AK47 and grab a few mags. Not the best idea to take an enemies weapon since you don't know how well they clean it. If its not up to par then say good bye to your face and hands. But I digress, its a lot of pressure I'm taking on here so I went ahead and said 'Ehh, what the fuck, lets do this'.

Apparently the minute is up and the group starts to come out of the room.

"Come on, emergency exit is just up ahead." I say coolly.

Revy walks up beside me, clearly impressed with my work... bitch should be since I AM THE INFAMOUS 'DEMON OF THE EAST' MUAHAHAHA... *ahem* I mean she should be since I have the adequate skill for such things... yes... that's what I meant to say.

"Fuck, Ken. Nice job." She said.

I just keep my deadened stare ahead of me, listening to my music play. Oh that reminds me, another song came on. ('Been to hell' by Hollywood Undead) Best selection of music for this setting AND this city... creepy how accurate it is too.

"Go to the car with the rest of them, I'll clean up the place and meet you at the boat, shouldn't take long."

"I still say you're a kill hog." Revy said smugly.

"Leave before I consider you in my way." I slightly glance at her.

She seemed irked by my stare but said nothing... which was uncharacteristic of her, considering everything. She mock saluted and ran with the rest of the group to the car.

After I hear the car screech off, the terrorists pull back because they thought EVERYONE left... oh how wrong they were. I make my way to an apartment with an open door and proceed to look out the window slightly. 19 of them were left and at their cars, waiting for their orders. Soon they were gonna be dead with the radio saying if they don't pick up then they are traitors and they will be killed along with their whole family.

Oh how I love misunderstanding's, they are SO MUCH FUN!

I position my AK on the window sill since the window was broken and aim it at the guy with the radio... dude's scrambled like deer. TARGET PRACTICE TIME.

I aim to my left and calmly fire 4 times, boom headshot, boom eyeshot, boom headshot, boom nutshot... OUCH I wasn't aiming there! The guy just suddenly started to run! Wasn't my fault! I do another boom headshot on the guy to put him out of his misery.

They then look at the windows trying to find who's shooting at them. They finally do after I kill another 3 people.

I fire randomly, killing only 1 guy, making them duck behind their cover again. I did this so I can reload without being fired at. I finally reload the damn thing after the mag slipped through my fingers 3 fucking times since it had dead guy's blood on it, unfortunately during that time they poked their heads out and didn't see me but they fired at my window just to be sure. Got nicked in the thigh, arm and face... close calls every where I tell you.

After they finished, they thought I was either gone and dead so they cautiously come out of their hiding spots.

Now you have to understand I get major adrenaline rush's when I... 'work' so its understandable that TO ME everything is in slow mo somewhat. I capitalize like the American I am not and again, somewhat twitchy with calmly, fire into the terrorist 12 man crowd, killing them all with my hax aimbot headshot program... I'm not serious about all the but I did headshot them all. Now I'm not gonna go on to say that I'm totally OP and need to be nerfed since its me we're talking about... but I'm pretty sure some nerd some where (Read fanfiction reader) will yell 'YOU MADE HIM TOO OP, DISLIKE AND DISFAVORITE! ALSO I WILL WRITE AN ANGRY REVIEW OF HOW BUTTHURT I AM!'... ok maybe not in those exact words but you get the idea.

I am NOT OP because someone somewhere is better than me... in SOME skill sets since I'm a master Assassin guy and someone somewhere may be a master florist or some shit... I don't know shit bout flowers... all I know is that they're pretty and that most civilians give them to their SO... (Significant other) or some shit... us Assassin's give our soul mate weapons to kill people with and sometimes sex toy's since we may be apart for long periods of time... damn now I'm depressed since I haven't met someone like that. (Cliché set up for romance no?)

I'm brought out of my at least 10 minutes of thought when I heard a moan and groan from a guy I thought I headshotted. Oh well. You know what they, read ME, say's about taking prisoner's... there are none. I turn off my iPod and take out my headphone's and pocket them. If you're asking how I heard that guy over my music then you have to realize he was basically screaming...

Since there are no more baddies, I unload the rest of the clip into the guy. When I'm finished I drop the AK and the mags for it and jump from the window onto a car roof since I'm badass like that and get into the least damaged car and drive off towards the port, taking a long drag of my cig I almost forgotten, finishing it in one go.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

On the boat in the middle of the night...

"Yo, Ken." Revy said

"Hmm?" I was leaning against the boats wall with one leg resting on it as well, (You know, the cool guy stance or some shit. You guy's know what i'm talking bout don'tcha?) opening one eye. I was listening to my music but I had one of the speakers off so I could hear.

"Bring me the Remington and the Hydra API for ammo."

"Sure thing." I make my way towards the gun case and get the stuff she asked for. I head back and hand her the gun. After a few seconds I hear shot's.

"Alright, we've taken out enemy's eyes, but that might not be all. Ken..." I walk up from behind him. "... We'll be bait and charge toward Basilan. I want you and Revy to get off at Zamboanga and use the Zodiac to get to Basilan."

"Ya got it boss."

"Don't call me boss."

"Fine then, Black guy who's in charge of us." I jokingly say.

"Much better."

I, of course, get a tick mark on my forehead... I wonder if that's a cancer, I should probably get that checked out. Might be fatal.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

On the deck of the ship 10 minutes later...

"So, once we relieved the papers we'll meet you at the base." Revy said.

"Yea, I'll come get you when I lose the guys that are bitten on." Dutch said. (If you don't understand why I wrote 'bitten on', I just copied it from the anime and to make it clear, it you haven't already figured it out, it basically means they are the fish and hes the bait so hence, bitten on)

"Guys who fight for a cause are so damn persistent." Revy spoke with a hint of annoyance.

"Oh yeah, almost forgot. I have a message from Mr. Chang." He then hands her a paper.

"Read it after you guys are on the boat." He continued.

"Sure thing, Black guy who's in charge of us."

Smug bastard just smirked.

After a few minutes on the Zodiac, I notice something out of the corner of my eye. A boat... hahaha yeah a boat, trying to be all sneaky sneak. I'll let it slide for now. I mean, shit man, I wanna kill more bastards... although Revy would probably be there to steal mah killz... shit... oh well might as well let her have her fun, beggars can't be chooser's I guess.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After a few hour's into the trip...

OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD... THAT WAS A LONG ASS BOAT RIDE.

I mean come on man I don't mind ridin' the waves but ON THAT SMALL OF A FUCKING BOAT? I don't think I'll be out on the waters again for a long while... blegh...

Well, anyway, we made it to the island which actually looked sorta peacful.

"This is such a dinky-ass place." I hear Revy say. Bitch be jokin right? RIGHT?

"What time is it?" She continued before I could say anything.

I look at my epic black as night watch on my left wrist.

"0600." I reply lazily.

"06-what now?"

I just give her a deadpan stare.

"It means six o'clock in the fucking morning you untrained grunt." Oh shit... shouldn't have said the last part... if Revy hates anything more than a guy ruining her day is that she hates being grouped with regular gunman.

"The fuck you say you chink?"

"You're a chink, japanese are chonks... well at least I think so... haven't really caught up on the racism jokes as of late."

"Ugh, forget it. Just hurry your ass up."

I give her a soldier's salute, offical shit and everything.

"Sir yes sir!"

"It's Ma'am, jackass."

"Well you know... I thought it would be fitting since there's no way you're a woman. I mean for god sakes you have a boner!" I yell, pointing at her crotch area.

"BULL SHIT I DO!"

"Look closely!"

"THAT MY JEANS ZIPPER YOU MORON! EVERY JEAN WEARING PIECE OF SHIT HAS THAT BUMP!"

"HAHAHA! I fucking know that! I just thought I'd try to be funny." I say back, holding my stomach.

As my laughter died down, I wipe a tear from my eye.

"Ok, in all seriousness the village should be right ahead up there."

"Let's get going, we wasted enough time already."

"Aye, aye Captain... bitch." I snicker.

"Stop fucking around! I know what you said ass hole! Shut up and get serious or else i'm making you a new ass hole to shit out of!"

Ok I couldn't hold it anymore, i'm dying of laughter here! Oh god... I cant it! AHAHAHAHA.

My laughter finally starts to die down after awhile, well died down enough for me to choke out:

"I'm sorry, couldn't help it. The anticipation of getting some action is killing me."

"You can get laid back at Roanapur."

"I'm talking about killing people. I'd rather put a bullet in my head than fuck a hooker. I ain't riskin it and I sure as hell as ain't for her to get checked. I seduce my ladies to get what I want."

"You couldn't seduce a rock." She held back a snicker.

"Oh... you're just looking to get shot aren't ya?" I glare at her.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After a few minutes walk...

"Man, its pretty quiet 'round here." I point out.

"It's a human-less ghost village." Revy commented.

"There's been a martial-law here for the past two years. The police and guerillas are shooting lead at each other day and night." She continued.

"Huh, I guess people got tired of being in the crossfire and went to an actual city I guess." I smartly theorized. Not to brag or anything but I come up with awesome theories and they usually turn out to be right.

Now, I know I just heard what happened about the people and everything but I mean its WAY too quiet here... I mean seriously quiet...

I was broke out of my spidey sense theory and heard a car start up... which turned out to be a jeep... coming for us... I knew I should have taken a red bull with me... cause you know... wings 'n shit.

It passes us slightly and then stops. Me and Revy immediately pulled out our respective weapons and point at the vehicle.

The window rolled down and revealed a shady lookin motha fucka... and mama always said to watch out for shady lookin motha fuckas even though we fit into that category... I think she meant to look out for OTHER shady looking motha fuckas... yeah.

"Did I keep you waiting? You're from Lagoon company, right? I heard there were four of you." Shady lookin motha fucka said.

Revy put back her pistol but I had my aiming towards the ground just in case I needed it... as you can tell I don't put a whole lot of trust in shady motha fucka looking deals.

"And why should I answer that?" Revy asked with a slight smirk.

"Aww, come on." He slightly whined...

Is... is th-... is that guy actually for legitz whining?

"Just me and him and a briefcase. That's it."

"I don't see your parter. Where's your guard?" Revy continued.

I noticed the guy leaned on his steering wheel before he answered... is that sweat? Its at least 74 degrees out... no way that guy is sweating... oh shit, he nervous. Something is about to happen and I don't like it.

"He's running around looking for a bathroom." He chuckles a little.

"He doesn't know the difference between beer and volvic." He continued. I get a better grip on my weapon. You know... just in case.

"So lets cut to the chase." Revy decided to cut the chit chat and finally get down to business.

"The Triad is..." She continued.

"What about them?" He asked.

I remember Mr. Glasses telling us the code before we dropped him off at one of his safehouses. It was 'The Triad is super cool. Arrogant much?

I pulled up my pistol, I knew something was shady bout this guy.

"Tell me what happened to the guy we were really supposed to meet and I promise your torture will exclude bone torture... that's as low as I go." I threaten... yeah... bone torture is bad mang, I mean like I take a hammer to someones hand or foot and keep bashing until their bones should be in pieces so then I cut an opening in their foot to see the bone. I mean I take care of the blood first so I can see but anyway I take some tweezers and mess with their shit... works 89.5% of the time.

I say 89.5% cause sometimes I just get bored when they pass out nearly every time and just go back to the usual ball torture (not the sex kind mind you) or ovary torture, if you're a woman I mean. The list goes on and on of what I could do. OH and I nearly forgot I made a special concoction that, if injected, makes that specific area 6x more sensitive. ITS FUN I TELL YOU!

"Hey, hey hey. Calm down. I was just messing with you. The Triad is super cool, right?" He says, smirking... not smiling... smirking... ok, It's official, some shit's bout to happen.

I put my gun back to aiming at the ground.

"You shouldn't fuck with people during deals, it WILL get you killed." I said coldly.

"Hehehe, twitchy finger I see."

"You know it, once I know who I shouldn't like, I end them."

"Quiet a philosophy you got there."

"Eeyup."

"Anyway, Mr. Chang's sense of humor is a little screwy ain't it?" He said with a slight smile.

"You think so too?" Revy spoke up.

"Yeah, I actually didn't think it was bad... for Mr. Chang anyway." He chuckled.

"Exactly, asshole." Revy said with a low tone.

I tilt my head in confusion, I thought we WEREN'T supposed to try and piss off people during deals... I mean... I do that sometimes but with Revy? She's been in this business for deals and such for longer than I have so... wtf bro?

"I have a message from the boss for you." She continued.

If she's talking bout that piece 'o paper then I totally forgot about it but still... i'm pissed she ddn't share that little piece of info with me, ITS A TEAM EFFORT, 'MEMBER BITCH? I'M APART OF THIS TEAM TOO YA KNOW!

"I am Taishanfujun. You don't know the meaning? It's the god of death and punishment here to bring down judgment." She continued, again.

"I don't know where you got the password, but Boss Chang isn't an idiot or a fool." She continued... again... any end to your talking yet?

"He prepared a new password for shitheads like you. You hopped into this parade with your ass hanging out." She continued... OH FOR FUCKS SAKE WOMAN JUST SHOOT HIM ALREADY!

"What? Laugh already. This is the part where you laugh. _Laugh_." She seethed. SHOOT HIM NOW OR I WILL YOU UNTRAINED BITCH!

"I guess I got carried away. Getting handled like this by a little girl, pathetic..." For a moment, nothing happened... then I saw the tell tale twitch.

FINALLY WE GET TO SHOOT SOMETHING INTO OBLIVION!... not to be confused with the Elders Scrolls: Oblivion...

The man in the jeep reached for his gun while Revy reached for her gun, I think they both forgot I had my own out. Yup... thats right, I shot the bastards hand as soon as it came up, making him bleed in his hand and drop his gun.

I was falling back to get some cover cause I do NOT fucking know if there are more people so I ran down the road to see if I can find an open door or an alley.

Of course... I couldn't get the chance too when the jeep switched into reverse, got in my way and ended up with my getting fucking tazed by a fucking ninja terrorist who was in the jeep the ENTIRE TIME!... I wanna know where he got training cause I fucking swear that back seat was empty...

Ok, well... I DID get tazed but... I tazed myself I guess you could say? I saw the guy coming out of the door so I blocked his tazer arm with my gun arm, my gun pointing towards his head... you know how that goes. BOOM. Dead. Although, you'd think that after you kill a guy he releases his grop on things... this guy... had a death grip on that tazer so when he fell... I fell face first into the back seat of the car... yeah... not my greatest moment I admit...

I'm used to getting tazed since I was trained to withstand it but it's been years since I got tazed last so this one was, no pun intended, a shock for me.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

At the terrorist camp...

"_Fucking took all my shit... fucking gonna pay...THEY EVEN FUCKING TOOK MY JECKET AND VEST...THOSE ASSHOLES. I WAS GONNA KILL THEM WHEN THEY TAZED ME BUT NOW THEY TOOK MY SHIT AND NOW I'M FUCKING FURIOUS! I'M GONNA DOUBLE FUCKING KILL THEM! I TAKE NO PRINOERS AND NOW THAT THEY HAVE MY SHIT, I'M GONNA FUCKING ENFORCE THAT RULE...THOSE FUCKERS!" _I scream in my head.

"_Well at least I shot his fucking hand, bastard finally got it bandaged... wait a sec... IF THAT SON OF A BITCH WEARING MY COAT? Yup... that's it... this place is going to hell... literally... it will look like fucking Satan walked through here...NO ONE LEAVES THIS PLACE ALIVE!" _

While I was so fucking mad I think I had literal steam coming out of my head, I overhead the two big bosses of this camp... well I think they are anyway.

"Hey, you made it." The jeep dude said to this dark skinned, low budget, Luigi lookin motha fucka who was glaring at me like I would burst into flames with his stare...

"We've formed an alliance. This camp is under our command now." Luigi said.

"Perfect." Jeep guy replied.

"Now..." Jeep dude looks at me. "... Welcome to our demilitarized zone. We saw what was inside the briefcase. It was empty."

"Oh? I hadn't noticed... from my understanding there should be a device which has its own little dimension pocket storage thing where you can put things in, no matter how big, and pull them right back out at the flick of your wrist." I said with the utmost seriousness. Hell, I was so serious even the low level terrorists grunts questioned each other like 'Is he for real?', 'Nah man he's just fucking around with us.'

My personal favorite convo. 'Hey, Marcus. With what he said, I still don't think your mom could fit in there.' The guy snickered. 'YOU MOTHA FUCKIN ASSHOLE I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GONNA KILL YOU IF YOU MAKE ONE MORE MOM JOKE!'.

Course, all this was in their language so they had no clue I understood the shit they said, nearly died laughing at the last one though.

"Don't fuck around with us kid, we know you're joking." Luigi said.

"Luigi, bro... come on, you were supposed to be cool... I mean not as cool as your brother mario since you're the retarded brother of the family..." I shrug. "... Anyway, I'm totally serious that there should be a small device like that in that briefcase right here... although... you didn't force it open did you? Cause if you did then we are all kinds of fucked..." (Case go boom boom, if you know what I mean... not the sex kind . the other kind...)

Luigi bro got a few thousand ticks marks on his head when he heard me... I swear to god hes got type 10 tick mark cancer... god... poor fella, won't make through the night I tell ya.

"Now boy, you can tell us where the package is... or... we can go down the hard path and..."

"Bang your mom? Bang your mom, right? That's what you were going to say? Yeah, no thanks... I already saw her a few days ago... creepy as fuck in the bedroom. I can get hard at some weird things but what SHES into? Yeah, I fucking draw the line and THAT kind of shit." Again, all ceral face 'n shit.

The men just gave me a deadpan stare.

"Ok that's it, tie him to a chair and put him in that building over there. I'll deal with him myself." Jeep dude said.

As they were tying my hands, I was talking 'U wot m8' shit talk to the guy.

"What? You gonna lock me up cause you can't handle the truth that your mom into some sick and twisted shit and for that shit, that's the reason she can't keep a good healthy marriage? Damn dude, you got more problems than me... and i'm fucked up." Again, ceralness.

"GET HIM OVER THERE NOW!" Luigi bro yelled... I like Luigi bro... he's the 'fun' brother, I can tell. HAHAHAHAHAHA

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

**AAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNDDDDDDD...wait for it...DONE! *confetti pops out every where* OMG OMG OMG OMG 7th CHAPTER IS OUT? YESH! WOOT! **

**Thanks so much you guys for taking the time to favorite, follow and most importantly, reviewing this story. It's mean SO MUCH to me when you guy's do... gives me that little self esteem boost, no joke. I love you guy's *sniff sniff* I love you guy's so damn much, it hurts. **

***Southern bell accent* But we can't be together, father wouldn't allow it. I'm sorry... I can't... **

***Regular, manly voice* (ahem) ANYWAY, I seriously do love you guy's for being patient with me and my procrastination and every thang, really appreciate it.**

**So next time on 'Demon of the East' SHITS ABOUT TO GO DOWN IN THAT CAMP! WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING! KEN (Rock) BEING BADASS/GODLIKE NEXT CHAPTER! For those of you who hate that sort of stuff anf find it quote on quote 'Unrealistic' may I remind you that this is a fanfiction of an anime... anime badass people are ALWAYS godlike/op and need to be nerfed... BUT THEY NEVER DO SINCE THEY'RE SO FUCKING AWESOME... anyway, love you guys**

**THEFUNNYMONEKY PEACEING THE FUCK OUT! *Does the peace hand sign* **


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